I am solitary by choice, not circumstances.
I have friends, I'm not lonely.
I have love, I do have a heart.
I can be cold, I am made to be stronger than most.
I can be quiet, I was born to be the only child.
I can be funny and loud, I was taught to always have fun.
I can be anything I want to be. Only because I can.
Hana
Mr. Udders
Maya's Baked Goodies
Nazri
Nadiah
Laremy the Cow
Aida
Ruz
Ed Koh
Travels
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Melbourne I
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Liverpool
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Pisa
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Prague
Berlin
Amsterdam
Europe In Lomo
Mr. Udders
Maya's Baked Goodies
Nazri
Nadiah
Laremy the Cow
Aida
Ruz
Ed Koh
Travels
New York I
New York II
New York III
New York IV
New York V
Melbourne I
Melbourne II
Melbourne III
Melbourne IV
Melbourne V
Liverpool
London
Paris
Lisbon
Barcelona
Fez
Milan
Pisa
Rome
Rome/ Vatican/ Venice
Venice/ Vienna
Prague
Berlin
Amsterdam
Europe In Lomo
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Bituwin -
Blogskin
Edited by Yours Truly.
Blog Title is E.B. White's famous words, rephrased.
Sunday, October 31, 2004
because i am feeling tralala (OOH YOU TOUCHED MY TRALALA) i shall post this pic. i really wanna post some really nice photos but since my inner mouse broke down (ooh so sad and how METAPHORICAL- inner mouse, inner soul, geddit? bah.) i have to use an external mouse hence i need a multi- split USB port. :) yea i just talked IT fiza RULES! p.s: you touched my tralala is a TRANCE song sent to me courtesy of bona who is lately very entertaining and nice. yay me.
saturday was 9 hours of banner- making. thai trip better be good.
sa bay dii rer kha? chan sa bay dii kha. :)
yang mai dai kin kha.
mum will come with food later.
and i, wonderful fantastic i that is me that is not you that is the owner of this blog you're reading, yes me, have realized tomorrow is the last monday of school. last week of school. eeps.
hence the deadlines. i have 2 10- page essays to do. one 2k word essay to do. 3 field trip reports to do. all by that beautiful friday which is 5th nov. ooh la la. exciting life of me.
also means hari raya coming. also means thai trip coming. also means exams. also means new year coming. new sem. too fast.
way too fast. did one sem really just past me by?
phew.
sa bay dii rer kha? chan sa bay dii kha. :)
yang mai dai kin kha.
mum will come with food later.
and i, wonderful fantastic i that is me that is not you that is the owner of this blog you're reading, yes me, have realized tomorrow is the last monday of school. last week of school. eeps.
hence the deadlines. i have 2 10- page essays to do. one 2k word essay to do. 3 field trip reports to do. all by that beautiful friday which is 5th nov. ooh la la. exciting life of me.
also means hari raya coming. also means thai trip coming. also means exams. also means new year coming. new sem. too fast.
way too fast. did one sem really just past me by?
phew.
Saturday, October 30, 2004
just felt a need to blog. just ramble... am feeling cranky and whiny and pessimistic.
don't i always.
something's different about tonight. somehow my heart feels LITERALLY heavy. like MASS heavy. haiiiiiiiiya.
i don't know la. i don't believe in love, hope and optimism.
and i realized that that made me a sad person!!!!!! hahaha.
i don't know. i want to stop the world from turning and just make it all end... cuz. haiya. no point la.
but this could just be mopey fiza talking. now let me do a very general name and word ramble k. bear with me my communist compatriots. (yes mao's back.)
laremy. hafiz. faizal. najib. faizal. hafiz. erwin. hairul. arun. islam class. malay studies. exams. stress. thailand. money. blood test. hari raya. geylang. black. emptiness. dad. mum. stepdad. stepsis. mickey mouse. amirul. luqman. abdul. nianlong.
ok enough. haaaaaaaaaaaaa. *long sigh* none were repeated words btw. but whatever. argh.
am losing it. but tmr, i'll get it back.
and the beauty of it all is i don't know what it is. but i keep losing it and finding it over and over again just the same.
boo. fiza sucks. haha. nono. am not going to delve is self- pity cuz that's just pathetic! and i'm not there. yet. ever. haha.
why am i laughing when i'm depressed? hahaha. i'm so godawfully weird.
haiya. if i believe in love, i'll know what it is. if i know it i can have it. but i don't even believe! so. zero point!
but am not sad or anything... i can so live alone. i'll RATHER live alone. but i'd rather live alone but know that i believe in love and the whole someone somewhere loves me and is waiting for me right now shit. hah.
but i'm a non- believer. so bodoh. so forget it. i'm just pmsing la.
don't i always.
something's different about tonight. somehow my heart feels LITERALLY heavy. like MASS heavy. haiiiiiiiiya.
i don't know la. i don't believe in love, hope and optimism.
and i realized that that made me a sad person!!!!!! hahaha.
i don't know. i want to stop the world from turning and just make it all end... cuz. haiya. no point la.
but this could just be mopey fiza talking. now let me do a very general name and word ramble k. bear with me my communist compatriots. (yes mao's back.)
laremy. hafiz. faizal. najib. faizal. hafiz. erwin. hairul. arun. islam class. malay studies. exams. stress. thailand. money. blood test. hari raya. geylang. black. emptiness. dad. mum. stepdad. stepsis. mickey mouse. amirul. luqman. abdul. nianlong.
ok enough. haaaaaaaaaaaaa. *long sigh* none were repeated words btw. but whatever. argh.
am losing it. but tmr, i'll get it back.
and the beauty of it all is i don't know what it is. but i keep losing it and finding it over and over again just the same.
boo. fiza sucks. haha. nono. am not going to delve is self- pity cuz that's just pathetic! and i'm not there. yet. ever. haha.
why am i laughing when i'm depressed? hahaha. i'm so godawfully weird.
haiya. if i believe in love, i'll know what it is. if i know it i can have it. but i don't even believe! so. zero point!
but am not sad or anything... i can so live alone. i'll RATHER live alone. but i'd rather live alone but know that i believe in love and the whole someone somewhere loves me and is waiting for me right now shit. hah.
but i'm a non- believer. so bodoh. so forget it. i'm just pmsing la.
Friday, October 29, 2004
being fickle is the only thing i'm good at. grr.
NAJIB. whom last week, saw fiza's weird peering face. also known as the shocked- embarassed- to- be- caught-peering- by- god of handsome face. that's RARE. believe it or not. yea. only happens when fiza is fascinated by why suddenly the computer lab at usp block is booked for 2 hours. this has never happened before. ooh let's lookie who's class it is since i'm so goddamn famous i ought to know someone in there right? right. i did. qingru is in it. not like SHE saw me.
FAIZAL. who is suddenly conveniently single. and tells me so. along with the fact that he has quit school. and to "contact" him if anything happens. and how do i do that my dear friend? telepathy? beam you a message by pressing my forehead across my glass window hoping that the mental notes in my head is beamed across the universe and into your head? somehow? hah? hmm?
HAFIZ. you. touchy topic. i don't ever know how to talk about you. i don't want to be in a relationship. you can't be in a relationship. we are not in a relationship. love is relative. life is short. and fiza is stupid fickle and totally rambling. whee.
i don't want to be attached. it's... complicated. i'm emotionally barren. hoo. don't you just love that phrase. emotionally barren. and MENTALLY ABSENT ON TOP OF THAT, FIZA. boo.
no time no feelings no desire ok? ok. i don't know who i'm talking to. the general public i guess. oh bow to me my people! proletariats shall all come together and rule china as one! i am mao zedong! yes! in prettier hair and nicer clothes and, *looks down* ooooh, heels! man i hated that cropped hair and collared dull brown short- sleeved shirts and black leather shoes i wore!
hmm. i want to be loved? maybe. (this is fiza speaking not mao. he went for a toilet break.)
liked? yes... uh. maybe. it's got this looming foreboding bonding psyeudo- commitment tying down connotation i dislike.
crushed on? DEFINITELY! ONE AND ALL! COME COME! COME AND HAVE A CRUSH ON ME! CRUSHES ARE ALWAYS ACCEPTED! NO HOLDS BARRED NO SEXUAL PREFERENCES! WHITES YELLOW BLACK BROWN WE'RE ALL EQUAL! WE WILL ALL RESIST THE WESTERN CAPITALIST SYSTEM! DO NOT EAT MCDONALDS!
ooh too late.
nyeh.
sigh.
najib has INDIAN blood. now i'm no racist ok. i'm mao zedong man! but that's besides the point. i'm indianphobic. is that such a word? pure indians are still ok. but it's this half- half people that scares me. don't ask. i have a traumatic past. sob.
umm. ya. so naj has indian blood. pakistan or north indian or whatever. but it's HALF of him. half of him is made of wadeys and curry. wadey i like. curry is ok. but i am rambling. don't i always. :)
so now all of a sudden i'm not ready for that side of him.
HAH.
and here i am talking like i'm gonna MARRY him and we'll have all these multiracial multicultural issues.
he doesn't even know my name (this is questionable)/ me (again)/ my number. whatever. (questionable because hey, what are the chances anyone can forget my stupid peering through glass face? hmm hmm hmm?)
whatever. i just think we'll make DARN HOT KIDS! hoo hoo.
p.s: no i'm not a pervert. the above was not a manifestation of my sexual fantasies bout naj cuz 1- i don't do fantasies 2- even if i do it's not ever about SEX (ooh she said the S word) and 3- YOU pervert. that was not a sexual statement. it was a statement with regards to GENETIC ENGINEERING. geddit. hot kids. genes. combined. look good. etc. blah. forget it. PERVVVVV.
NAJIB. whom last week, saw fiza's weird peering face. also known as the shocked- embarassed- to- be- caught-peering- by- god of handsome face. that's RARE. believe it or not. yea. only happens when fiza is fascinated by why suddenly the computer lab at usp block is booked for 2 hours. this has never happened before. ooh let's lookie who's class it is since i'm so goddamn famous i ought to know someone in there right? right. i did. qingru is in it. not like SHE saw me.
FAIZAL. who is suddenly conveniently single. and tells me so. along with the fact that he has quit school. and to "contact" him if anything happens. and how do i do that my dear friend? telepathy? beam you a message by pressing my forehead across my glass window hoping that the mental notes in my head is beamed across the universe and into your head? somehow? hah? hmm?
HAFIZ. you. touchy topic. i don't ever know how to talk about you. i don't want to be in a relationship. you can't be in a relationship. we are not in a relationship. love is relative. life is short. and fiza is stupid fickle and totally rambling. whee.
i don't want to be attached. it's... complicated. i'm emotionally barren. hoo. don't you just love that phrase. emotionally barren. and MENTALLY ABSENT ON TOP OF THAT, FIZA. boo.
no time no feelings no desire ok? ok. i don't know who i'm talking to. the general public i guess. oh bow to me my people! proletariats shall all come together and rule china as one! i am mao zedong! yes! in prettier hair and nicer clothes and, *looks down* ooooh, heels! man i hated that cropped hair and collared dull brown short- sleeved shirts and black leather shoes i wore!
hmm. i want to be loved? maybe. (this is fiza speaking not mao. he went for a toilet break.)
liked? yes... uh. maybe. it's got this looming foreboding bonding psyeudo- commitment tying down connotation i dislike.
crushed on? DEFINITELY! ONE AND ALL! COME COME! COME AND HAVE A CRUSH ON ME! CRUSHES ARE ALWAYS ACCEPTED! NO HOLDS BARRED NO SEXUAL PREFERENCES! WHITES YELLOW BLACK BROWN WE'RE ALL EQUAL! WE WILL ALL RESIST THE WESTERN CAPITALIST SYSTEM! DO NOT EAT MCDONALDS!
ooh too late.
nyeh.
sigh.
najib has INDIAN blood. now i'm no racist ok. i'm mao zedong man! but that's besides the point. i'm indianphobic. is that such a word? pure indians are still ok. but it's this half- half people that scares me. don't ask. i have a traumatic past. sob.
umm. ya. so naj has indian blood. pakistan or north indian or whatever. but it's HALF of him. half of him is made of wadeys and curry. wadey i like. curry is ok. but i am rambling. don't i always. :)
so now all of a sudden i'm not ready for that side of him.
HAH.
and here i am talking like i'm gonna MARRY him and we'll have all these multiracial multicultural issues.
he doesn't even know my name (this is questionable)/ me (again)/ my number. whatever. (questionable because hey, what are the chances anyone can forget my stupid peering through glass face? hmm hmm hmm?)
whatever. i just think we'll make DARN HOT KIDS! hoo hoo.
p.s: no i'm not a pervert. the above was not a manifestation of my sexual fantasies bout naj cuz 1- i don't do fantasies 2- even if i do it's not ever about SEX (ooh she said the S word) and 3- YOU pervert. that was not a sexual statement. it was a statement with regards to GENETIC ENGINEERING. geddit. hot kids. genes. combined. look good. etc. blah. forget it. PERVVVVV.
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
one more night gone without any sleep.
g'morning world. hope YOU had a good night sleep.
won't take a genius to figure out my mood today.
avoid me today, one and all.
i'm atilla the hun on a warpath. i even have warpaint.
will provide pictorial evidence later. now cranky ol' me will go BATHE and CHANGE and GO TO SCHOOL because i have SOCI TUTORIAL at EIGHT freaking A.M.
i am dressed like nyonya today. those in need of a laugh come see me.
but don't let me see or hear you laugh.
the warpaint is still ON. deep in my soul, i will always have warpaint. i will always be hitler. i will always be on a warpath.
so beware.
lack of sleep makes me act really weird. 'Oh Fiza, but how would we know the difference?' you cry. HA HA HA. Oh, what it is to laugh.
g'morning world. hope YOU had a good night sleep.
won't take a genius to figure out my mood today.
avoid me today, one and all.
i'm atilla the hun on a warpath. i even have warpaint.
will provide pictorial evidence later. now cranky ol' me will go BATHE and CHANGE and GO TO SCHOOL because i have SOCI TUTORIAL at EIGHT freaking A.M.
i am dressed like nyonya today. those in need of a laugh come see me.
but don't let me see or hear you laugh.
the warpaint is still ON. deep in my soul, i will always have warpaint. i will always be hitler. i will always be on a warpath.
so beware.
lack of sleep makes me act really weird. 'Oh Fiza, but how would we know the difference?' you cry. HA HA HA. Oh, what it is to laugh.
Monday, October 25, 2004
well well well.
friday was me at home. can't remember much now. my memory's failing. as minutes and moments pass i forget more and more of the past until i'm left with nothing of historical relation to yesterday or beyond and i am left hollowed because of the disorienting dislocation and i become a vacuum and fall to the floor like a sagging wet bag of cat food.
moving on!
saturday was me at home in the day then geylang land with apek yang belo teramat sangat at 5- ish. whoooo. head rush. firstly, the amount of dangdut being played. if that wasn't bad enough, i actually KNEW the song, having the warped childhood that i had. then the amount of baju melayus there were, but NONE was the green we wanted. nonono. they had dark green light green pastel green grass green blue- green sea green tree green but NO PUCUK PISANG GREEN. GRRRRRR.
but we FOUND it! yes! sherlock holmes and houston found it! or was it madison? madison square garden? new york? no moving on. yes, we found a hijau (green) pucuk (i dunno what this means so i can't translate) pisang (banana) baju melayu for the belo boy. so that's like, banana leaf green? or like VERY young and ripe banana green. simply said, borderline neon green but guess what? the chinonek looked good in it. while i would probably look like yes, you guessed it, a walking banana tree or better, a VERY young and ripe banana.
but but. that was end of the day. before breaking fast we wandering around the clothes place. of course. and THEN we decided to RISK it and walk past the food stalls to look at some more clothes. we of course were secretly too impatient to wait and just wanted to LOOOOOK at the food. and trust me, i actually went "ARGHH!!! nononono!" and clutched my head and no i wasn't acting but maybe i was too hungry. maybe? k i WAS. there was KEBABS, baked seafood, DENDENGS WHICH WILL BE THE DOOM OF ME, HONEY CHICKEN WHICH WILL ALSO BE THE DEATH OF ME, ayam perchik, suji, kurmas of a thousand different kinds (yes even these made me ballistic) and goodness knows what else. oh yes. burgers of a hundred variations and this: RIBS. HONEYED RIBS. WAAAAAARGHHHHH. i feel like tearing my hair out just typing them out. when did this happen to me? hmm...
so. ya. then we break our fast at kfc then walk around the bazaar got his baju bought a 100 sorts of food and got really really tired. i began to feel claustrophobic with all the humans around. i honestly felt like the entire singapore was in geylang that night. anypoots at one point it got the point where i started pointing at the large looming crowd in the distance and in my head they started stampeding me so i just turned to hafiz and went "oh my god look.... look... so many people... argh...." uh. ya. at city plaza when we entered 2nd chance i took one step in and did an immediate about turn and crashed into hafiz. he was like what what and i went all wide- eyed and said, "PEOPLE...."
at one point of time at the traffic light a group of mats and minahs stopped and i guess the group leader or whatchamacallit went, "k stop stop kite headcount. 21 orang eh." translation: ok stop. we do a headcount. make sure got 21. ooooooooof.
more scary: at the train station on our way back, there was a bunch of mats gathering to go to the bazaar. this was 9 pm. and there was 15 of them and they were waiting for more. GOOOOOOOOGLE EYED.
today did some school work (summary: BORING!) and then granny's place for breaking fast (summary: YUMMY!) and then fort canning park for movie in the park with 2 girlies. the poltergeist. i usually laugh at these oldie scary movies and we did. till some point coffins with dead people started popping out of the wretched floor, i jumped into my friend's lap, one, and then went into hiding behind them. *shakes head and wags finger* am disappointed in you fiza. you are braver than that! you're a terrer muffin! what happened to you?
so this is long. so it is so it is. hams alive!! it's so long really, ooh goody let's make it longer and why am it talking like "little women" and old english women???? hmm??? oh goodness me, why, tell me o' wise one! impart me your wise knowledge to lead me out of this darkness!
i worry bout my sanity sometimes but as long as i'm happy i guess i'm fine. yesterday while waiting for the lift to come i did a john travolta pose, found it insufficient, and hence i proceeded with a few saturday night live moves. sigh.
oh and just now after too much walking i got a blister on my right foot and nobody had a plaster between me ana n farhanah. then farhanah said eh ana u have socks right? ana was like tentatively yaaa and long story short i borrowed her socks. and according to farhanah it's the first time she hear someone borrowing socks in the middle of the world. i'm inclined to agree.
so now am back in dorm. yeah yeah. am preparing for presentation in a jiffy. ooooh jiffy don't you just love that word.
oh k more reasons to question my sanity. i ate two honey chickens on saturday night and it was so scrumptuous. and i msged the beloness: "i just devoured two honey chicken. i feel evil. muahaha." that was continued by some random statement asking if the baju fits. he replied: "ya it does. my bro says it's nice." what worries me is he barely reacted to the fact that i felt evil after DEVOURING two chicken like a gargantua. so this could mean he can relate to my feelings which trust me mr mild- mannered totally CAN'T, or he has gotten used to my madness. and that means he has come to EXPECT me to be mad. uh uh. no good. that means i am USUALLY mad- sounding. which brings me to borderline madness. and since this is straightjacket i hear voices and see fairies mad and not hahahashe'sfunny mad, i have serious reason to worry.
*puts on a frown and chomps down honey chicken*
worry worry worry.
friday was me at home. can't remember much now. my memory's failing. as minutes and moments pass i forget more and more of the past until i'm left with nothing of historical relation to yesterday or beyond and i am left hollowed because of the disorienting dislocation and i become a vacuum and fall to the floor like a sagging wet bag of cat food.
moving on!
saturday was me at home in the day then geylang land with apek yang belo teramat sangat at 5- ish. whoooo. head rush. firstly, the amount of dangdut being played. if that wasn't bad enough, i actually KNEW the song, having the warped childhood that i had. then the amount of baju melayus there were, but NONE was the green we wanted. nonono. they had dark green light green pastel green grass green blue- green sea green tree green but NO PUCUK PISANG GREEN. GRRRRRR.
but we FOUND it! yes! sherlock holmes and houston found it! or was it madison? madison square garden? new york? no moving on. yes, we found a hijau (green) pucuk (i dunno what this means so i can't translate) pisang (banana) baju melayu for the belo boy. so that's like, banana leaf green? or like VERY young and ripe banana green. simply said, borderline neon green but guess what? the chinonek looked good in it. while i would probably look like yes, you guessed it, a walking banana tree or better, a VERY young and ripe banana.
but but. that was end of the day. before breaking fast we wandering around the clothes place. of course. and THEN we decided to RISK it and walk past the food stalls to look at some more clothes. we of course were secretly too impatient to wait and just wanted to LOOOOOK at the food. and trust me, i actually went "ARGHH!!! nononono!" and clutched my head and no i wasn't acting but maybe i was too hungry. maybe? k i WAS. there was KEBABS, baked seafood, DENDENGS WHICH WILL BE THE DOOM OF ME, HONEY CHICKEN WHICH WILL ALSO BE THE DEATH OF ME, ayam perchik, suji, kurmas of a thousand different kinds (yes even these made me ballistic) and goodness knows what else. oh yes. burgers of a hundred variations and this: RIBS. HONEYED RIBS. WAAAAAARGHHHHH. i feel like tearing my hair out just typing them out. when did this happen to me? hmm...
so. ya. then we break our fast at kfc then walk around the bazaar got his baju bought a 100 sorts of food and got really really tired. i began to feel claustrophobic with all the humans around. i honestly felt like the entire singapore was in geylang that night. anypoots at one point it got the point where i started pointing at the large looming crowd in the distance and in my head they started stampeding me so i just turned to hafiz and went "oh my god look.... look... so many people... argh...." uh. ya. at city plaza when we entered 2nd chance i took one step in and did an immediate about turn and crashed into hafiz. he was like what what and i went all wide- eyed and said, "PEOPLE...."
at one point of time at the traffic light a group of mats and minahs stopped and i guess the group leader or whatchamacallit went, "k stop stop kite headcount. 21 orang eh." translation: ok stop. we do a headcount. make sure got 21. ooooooooof.
more scary: at the train station on our way back, there was a bunch of mats gathering to go to the bazaar. this was 9 pm. and there was 15 of them and they were waiting for more. GOOOOOOOOGLE EYED.
today did some school work (summary: BORING!) and then granny's place for breaking fast (summary: YUMMY!) and then fort canning park for movie in the park with 2 girlies. the poltergeist. i usually laugh at these oldie scary movies and we did. till some point coffins with dead people started popping out of the wretched floor, i jumped into my friend's lap, one, and then went into hiding behind them. *shakes head and wags finger* am disappointed in you fiza. you are braver than that! you're a terrer muffin! what happened to you?
so this is long. so it is so it is. hams alive!! it's so long really, ooh goody let's make it longer and why am it talking like "little women" and old english women???? hmm??? oh goodness me, why, tell me o' wise one! impart me your wise knowledge to lead me out of this darkness!
i worry bout my sanity sometimes but as long as i'm happy i guess i'm fine. yesterday while waiting for the lift to come i did a john travolta pose, found it insufficient, and hence i proceeded with a few saturday night live moves. sigh.
oh and just now after too much walking i got a blister on my right foot and nobody had a plaster between me ana n farhanah. then farhanah said eh ana u have socks right? ana was like tentatively yaaa and long story short i borrowed her socks. and according to farhanah it's the first time she hear someone borrowing socks in the middle of the world. i'm inclined to agree.
so now am back in dorm. yeah yeah. am preparing for presentation in a jiffy. ooooh jiffy don't you just love that word.
oh k more reasons to question my sanity. i ate two honey chickens on saturday night and it was so scrumptuous. and i msged the beloness: "i just devoured two honey chicken. i feel evil. muahaha." that was continued by some random statement asking if the baju fits. he replied: "ya it does. my bro says it's nice." what worries me is he barely reacted to the fact that i felt evil after DEVOURING two chicken like a gargantua. so this could mean he can relate to my feelings which trust me mr mild- mannered totally CAN'T, or he has gotten used to my madness. and that means he has come to EXPECT me to be mad. uh uh. no good. that means i am USUALLY mad- sounding. which brings me to borderline madness. and since this is straightjacket i hear voices and see fairies mad and not hahahashe'sfunny mad, i have serious reason to worry.
*puts on a frown and chomps down honey chicken*
worry worry worry.
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
i've just moved my bed. it seems that my "clean room= move furniture around" habit dies hard.
now my room looks more spacious. haaaa.
i'm really lazy. really too lazy to study.
haha.
scrrrrrew it.
now my room looks more spacious. haaaa.
i'm really lazy. really too lazy to study.
haha.
scrrrrrew it.
lalala.
it's been raining lately... rahmat. :)
ramadhan this year... brings back memories. fasting pre- A Levels. mugging while hungry. ha. those were the days.
something's telling me it might be you
so i think it's pretty confirmed that farhan's leaving for brunei... urhm. yeah. and that doesn't go down well for the lovebirds i guess. don't be to mushy and miserable la. things will be fine. leave it to Him.
cuz life goes on.
hahaha. anypoots. yea. i was thinking... if LimBelo gets posted overseas... brunei hongkong thailand india whatever... how would i react?
i guess i'll be happy. haha. not like i want him to go away... but i think some years of independence will do him good. will help build him up as a man and a person. independence is always good. teaches you.
so you hear that hafiz?!!! if you go don't expect me to be reduced to a sodding mess. hahaha. just anticipate the once in a blue moon blog entries bout missing you. even THAT depends. on. umm. dunno what. haha. najib maybe. WARGHKAKAKAKA. aaaaaaand hafiz has a cow. :D
anypoots. geylang with the belo boy this saturday. DENDENG!!!! AYAM PERCIK!!! AYAM MADU!!! AIR KHATIRA!!! CARAMEL PUDDING! MURTABAK!!! oooooh god.
k now i'm hungry. daaaaaaaamn.
better go pray zohor and hope God reinstores my iman.
hahahaha.
it's been raining lately... rahmat. :)
ramadhan this year... brings back memories. fasting pre- A Levels. mugging while hungry. ha. those were the days.
something's telling me it might be you
so i think it's pretty confirmed that farhan's leaving for brunei... urhm. yeah. and that doesn't go down well for the lovebirds i guess. don't be to mushy and miserable la. things will be fine. leave it to Him.
cuz life goes on.
hahaha. anypoots. yea. i was thinking... if LimBelo gets posted overseas... brunei hongkong thailand india whatever... how would i react?
i guess i'll be happy. haha. not like i want him to go away... but i think some years of independence will do him good. will help build him up as a man and a person. independence is always good. teaches you.
so you hear that hafiz?!!! if you go don't expect me to be reduced to a sodding mess. hahaha. just anticipate the once in a blue moon blog entries bout missing you. even THAT depends. on. umm. dunno what. haha. najib maybe. WARGHKAKAKAKA. aaaaaaand hafiz has a cow. :D
anypoots. geylang with the belo boy this saturday. DENDENG!!!! AYAM PERCIK!!! AYAM MADU!!! AIR KHATIRA!!! CARAMEL PUDDING! MURTABAK!!! oooooh god.
k now i'm hungry. daaaaaaaamn.
better go pray zohor and hope God reinstores my iman.
hahahaha.
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
Guns don't kill people. People kill people.
tried on my new Hari Raya baju kurung. and by that inspired moment, i shall wear a pink baju jurung to school tomorrow. :D
hana! read that! tomorrow! baju kurung day! haha.
break fast with fauzul and muneer, an Afghan German at Delifrance @ NUH. yes i broke fast in a hospital where several family members of mine passed on.
so anyway. yeah. muneer is cool. germany is a very interesting country. and fauzul eats like a pig and has horridly wrong fascination with tudung girls. SHAME ON YOU! hehe.
anyways. yea. still struggling with my history essay. The Irony of World War I: People Killing People to Survive.
lalala.
back to essay. :D
tried on my new Hari Raya baju kurung. and by that inspired moment, i shall wear a pink baju jurung to school tomorrow. :D
hana! read that! tomorrow! baju kurung day! haha.
break fast with fauzul and muneer, an Afghan German at Delifrance @ NUH. yes i broke fast in a hospital where several family members of mine passed on.
so anyway. yeah. muneer is cool. germany is a very interesting country. and fauzul eats like a pig and has horridly wrong fascination with tudung girls. SHAME ON YOU! hehe.
anyways. yea. still struggling with my history essay. The Irony of World War I: People Killing People to Survive.
lalala.
back to essay. :D
Monday, October 18, 2004
i actually miss malaysia. and all the genteel natural goodness that comes with it. the soft picturesque sunsets... the familiar, upbeat camaraderie of village people... the sweet smiles and shy waves of decent, sloppy kampung boys... the company of my cousins... the freedom and laxed sense of living... maybe i was born a kampung girl. heh.
was reading the documents i'm supposed to write on for HY1101E.
read those on world war 1 cuz as the joke goes... blood gore & violence= Fiza.
then i read.
scoured through pages of diary entries of soldiers who fought the battle. the battle of somme, the frechmen, the germans, the brits.
the claustrophobic conditions of the trenches and the mindlessness of the attacks drove the men almost mad and i almost got a fit reading how outrageous the conditions were.
"If your father came over with them you would not hesitate to fling a bomb into him."
"Beside me a lance- corporal has his head torn off. He runs a few steps more while the blood spouts from his neck like a fountain."
the same soldier saw the enemy, a Frenchman, died with arms up in prayers. The said praying man fell to his death with his body apart from his arms which were caught in the barb wires after it was shot right off his body.
war was a battle to survive for the people fighting it. but what do the bigwigs know? they just sent new reinforcements when the old regiment dies.
it reduced me to a soggy sobbing mess.
maybe violence and gore ain't my thing afterall.
read those on world war 1 cuz as the joke goes... blood gore & violence= Fiza.
then i read.
scoured through pages of diary entries of soldiers who fought the battle. the battle of somme, the frechmen, the germans, the brits.
the claustrophobic conditions of the trenches and the mindlessness of the attacks drove the men almost mad and i almost got a fit reading how outrageous the conditions were.
"If your father came over with them you would not hesitate to fling a bomb into him."
"Beside me a lance- corporal has his head torn off. He runs a few steps more while the blood spouts from his neck like a fountain."
the same soldier saw the enemy, a Frenchman, died with arms up in prayers. The said praying man fell to his death with his body apart from his arms which were caught in the barb wires after it was shot right off his body.
war was a battle to survive for the people fighting it. but what do the bigwigs know? they just sent new reinforcements when the old regiment dies.
it reduced me to a soggy sobbing mess.
maybe violence and gore ain't my thing afterall.
was reading the documents i'm supposed to write on for HY1101E.
read those on world war 1 cuz as the joke goes... blood gore & violence= Fiza.
then i read.
scoured through pages of diary entries of soldiers who fought the battle. the battle of somme, the frechmen, the germans, the brits.
the claustrophobic conditions of the trenches and the mindlessness of the attacks drove the men almost mad and i almost got a fit reading how outrageous the conditions were.
"If your father came over with them you would not hesitate to fling a bomb into him."
"Beside me a lance- corporal has his head torn off. He runs a few steps more while the blood spouts from his neck like a fountain."
the same soldier saw the enemy, a Frenchman, died with arms up in prayers. The said praying man fell to his death with his body apart from his arms which were caught in the barb wires after it was shot right off his body.
war was a battle to survive for the people fighting it. but what do the bigwigs know? they just sent new reinforcements when the old regiment dies.
it reduced me to a soggy sobbing mess.
maybe violence and gore ain't my thing afterall.
read those on world war 1 cuz as the joke goes... blood gore & violence= Fiza.
then i read.
scoured through pages of diary entries of soldiers who fought the battle. the battle of somme, the frechmen, the germans, the brits.
the claustrophobic conditions of the trenches and the mindlessness of the attacks drove the men almost mad and i almost got a fit reading how outrageous the conditions were.
"If your father came over with them you would not hesitate to fling a bomb into him."
"Beside me a lance- corporal has his head torn off. He runs a few steps more while the blood spouts from his neck like a fountain."
the same soldier saw the enemy, a Frenchman, died with arms up in prayers. The said praying man fell to his death with his body apart from his arms which were caught in the barb wires after it was shot right off his body.
war was a battle to survive for the people fighting it. but what do the bigwigs know? they just sent new reinforcements when the old regiment dies.
it reduced me to a soggy sobbing mess.
maybe violence and gore ain't my thing afterall.
Sunday, October 17, 2004
went home thursday night... am now back in pgp. have a history essay due tuesday and i have yet to read the document i'm writing on.
i am seriously lagging in my schoolwork. i feel horrible but... argh.
i know i've disappointed some people by my skipping classes and last minute work and lowered expectations. yeah no more dean's list for me la.
so sorry.
will go do my essay now with my tail between my legs and tongue lolling out in sadness.
i am seriously lagging in my schoolwork. i feel horrible but... argh.
i know i've disappointed some people by my skipping classes and last minute work and lowered expectations. yeah no more dean's list for me la.
so sorry.
will go do my essay now with my tail between my legs and tongue lolling out in sadness.
Thursday, October 14, 2004
good morning world!
time check, 7:39 a.m. *grins*
been awake since 5:20 a.m. doing my essay. lalala... am halfway through. having a break now. evolution essays always makes me feel very mindfucked. excuse the language. it is just like that la. it contends with all my beliefs and perceptions and i have to try to write a solid convincing essay while at the same time remain disbelieving of the theories and stuffs i read. nyehhhh.
last time was "The Tale of Eugenics". today it's "Lawrence: Hero, Villain, or Subversive Novelist?"
why all my essays seem to sound so kapunehneh one.
anyways.
am skipping islam class and going only for MS tutorial and Evo class. duh.
*grins suddenly* haha. just remembered farid. doink. he's such a character.
oh mum's birthday went well. shed the usual tears. we always get teary on birthdays and hari raya. oh well. :)
food was good though. haha.
met apek for a short while at lot 1. "used" him to borrow a book from CCK library. FINALLY CCK library holds some books worth borrowing. apparently, they keep it under "General Information" instead of fiction. huh. anyway ya borrowed Tis by Frank McCourt. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
besok puasa. translation: tomorrow fasting. meaning soon it's hari raya= 1, YAAAAAAAY.
2. EXAMS.
ever since i got hold of my A levels time- table, i gave up all hope of ever celebrating hari raya again. (how drama mama is that. haha.) i had a paper on the 2nd and 3rd day of raya last year. this year, my 1st paper is on 5th day of raya. and 2 more after that. kapundens.
so it goes for next 4 years. and more shall i pursue more studies. next time i celebrate hari raya, i would probably be married with kids.
*silence*
ok now i'm depressed. BOOOOOOOOOOOO.
anyhows. i am in very hari raya mode. sing sing sing. i have very bad english on my blog but who the poot cares cuz i write psychotic SCHOLARLY english every other moment of my life so HAH.
aidilfitri.......... hari bahgia..... hari yang muuuuliiiiiiaaaa!!!!!!!!!!! hafiz the schoolmate is my singing partner. yay.
oh. yea. farhan a.k.a hana's pootpoot is leaving for thai/brunei/somewhere not Sg end of this month. sth like that. i understand it's gonna be hard but hey, there's more to life than just speding time with boyfriends. :D you'll do fine without him. miss him, obviously, but it won't be too bad. i know it. so chilling the milling and everything will be fine. ok? *hugs*
besides next year i'll be at admiralty already so who needs boyfriends, or ANYONE for that matter, when you can have ME?!!! ME! memememememe! the oh so wonderful god awful glorious, ME!
was there ever a question that i'm insane? terminally, painfully, eh not painful it's not painful, uhhh. terminally permanently happily and joyously mad. :D
*beams*
__________________________________________________
warna is playing that very irritating but catchy and easily singalongable song tipahtertiputertiputiputertipah. hahahaha. i repeat. tipah tertipu tertipu tipu tertipah! tipah tertipu lagi!
whahahahaahahaha. k many many cows. fiza is bobbing and singing along to malaysian mat boyband. *does rapping motions* hahahahahaha. oh god. i believe i'll never be bored alone. i entertain myself! i am a self- sufficent clown! wow!
okbacktoevolutionessay.
eh wait chorus again! tipah tertipu tertipu tipu tertipah! tipah tertipu lagi! jangan salahkan ali something something tiada siapa yang boleh tolong lalala... ok he talks too fast.
time check, 7:39 a.m. *grins*
been awake since 5:20 a.m. doing my essay. lalala... am halfway through. having a break now. evolution essays always makes me feel very mindfucked. excuse the language. it is just like that la. it contends with all my beliefs and perceptions and i have to try to write a solid convincing essay while at the same time remain disbelieving of the theories and stuffs i read. nyehhhh.
last time was "The Tale of Eugenics". today it's "Lawrence: Hero, Villain, or Subversive Novelist?"
why all my essays seem to sound so kapunehneh one.
anyways.
am skipping islam class and going only for MS tutorial and Evo class. duh.
*grins suddenly* haha. just remembered farid. doink. he's such a character.
oh mum's birthday went well. shed the usual tears. we always get teary on birthdays and hari raya. oh well. :)
food was good though. haha.
met apek for a short while at lot 1. "used" him to borrow a book from CCK library. FINALLY CCK library holds some books worth borrowing. apparently, they keep it under "General Information" instead of fiction. huh. anyway ya borrowed Tis by Frank McCourt. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
besok puasa. translation: tomorrow fasting. meaning soon it's hari raya= 1, YAAAAAAAY.
2. EXAMS.
ever since i got hold of my A levels time- table, i gave up all hope of ever celebrating hari raya again. (how drama mama is that. haha.) i had a paper on the 2nd and 3rd day of raya last year. this year, my 1st paper is on 5th day of raya. and 2 more after that. kapundens.
so it goes for next 4 years. and more shall i pursue more studies. next time i celebrate hari raya, i would probably be married with kids.
*silence*
ok now i'm depressed. BOOOOOOOOOOOO.
anyhows. i am in very hari raya mode. sing sing sing. i have very bad english on my blog but who the poot cares cuz i write psychotic SCHOLARLY english every other moment of my life so HAH.
aidilfitri.......... hari bahgia..... hari yang muuuuliiiiiiaaaa!!!!!!!!!!! hafiz the schoolmate is my singing partner. yay.
oh. yea. farhan a.k.a hana's pootpoot is leaving for thai/brunei/somewhere not Sg end of this month. sth like that. i understand it's gonna be hard but hey, there's more to life than just speding time with boyfriends. :D you'll do fine without him. miss him, obviously, but it won't be too bad. i know it. so chilling the milling and everything will be fine. ok? *hugs*
besides next year i'll be at admiralty already so who needs boyfriends, or ANYONE for that matter, when you can have ME?!!! ME! memememememe! the oh so wonderful god awful glorious, ME!
was there ever a question that i'm insane? terminally, painfully, eh not painful it's not painful, uhhh. terminally permanently happily and joyously mad. :D
*beams*
__________________________________________________
warna is playing that very irritating but catchy and easily singalongable song tipahtertiputertiputiputertipah. hahahaha. i repeat. tipah tertipu tertipu tipu tertipah! tipah tertipu lagi!
whahahahaahahaha. k many many cows. fiza is bobbing and singing along to malaysian mat boyband. *does rapping motions* hahahahahaha. oh god. i believe i'll never be bored alone. i entertain myself! i am a self- sufficent clown! wow!
okbacktoevolutionessay.
eh wait chorus again! tipah tertipu tertipu tipu tertipah! tipah tertipu lagi! jangan salahkan ali something something tiada siapa yang boleh tolong lalala... ok he talks too fast.
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
sometimes, i wish i could be real. everyday. like REAL REAL. HARDCORE REAL. *makes hardcore face ala Jack Black in School of Rock*
i am this bubbly, flighty, chirpy, effervescent, funny, loud, easygoing, laughalot character that you all see daily. yes yes i am all that.
but that's not IT. do you understand that? can you even begin to decipher the depths of me? i think not.
i think the truest form of me appears only when i am sad. or feeling sombre. that's the real me. to speak in colour; what you see is ORANGE. but sometimes i think the real me is GRAY. not black, but meagre, bleak, gray.
i wish i can show that side of me. when i speak of life... death... mortality... when i write about emotions... social issues... when i speak of sorrow or joy... when i am... when i am feeling melancholic. and drunk on sadness.
maybe it's a societal oppression? the need to be the sunshine. yuck. i hate that. i HONESTLY do. i despise that term, the sunshine in the group, or terms such as those. for pete's sake, stop.
even the sun sets. and clouds do come. and rain still falls.
i don't blame it all on people around me. i myself, don't let that side of me out. so how can they know it exists?
but i think my issue here is... to know me first. to see all of me before making that moribund assumption of me being a bubbly person.
read my poetry. read between the lines of this blog. talk to me. bring up something to talk about that does not involve anyone being funny so that i won't laugh. don't blame me for laughing alot. that doesn't make me incapable of serious chats, that makes you, the clown.
maybe to some extent i shun serious sombrerity. but. i don't know. i just want people to see me. all sides of me. because i get such a single- dimensioned view.
i like watching sunrise. the change of colour in the sky. from black. deep suffocating endless black. to a dark blue. a lighter blue. an indigo of sorts. some violet streaks. it gets lighter and lighter and brighter... almost as though with each passing minute, there's more and more hope.
hope.
i don't believe in hoping. hoping leads to disappointment. i don't like commitment. tying myself down suffocates me and scares me. i don't like deaths. they produce a finality that i have never learnt to deal with.
i love the idea of love. but i think it's so vague and unsubstantiated. it's there... but not there. liminal. i think feeling is such a fluffy concept.
gut feelings, you just know it, etc. i don't believe in these.
i wish you can see me for all that i am. i'm more than just a happy person.
i wish i can show all of me too. i really want to. but we all know... we're all icebergs. so to reveal all of me is really a subjective concept.
i wish. i wish. i wish. wishing is like hoping. and we know what that leads to. what am i doing?
i am this bubbly, flighty, chirpy, effervescent, funny, loud, easygoing, laughalot character that you all see daily. yes yes i am all that.
but that's not IT. do you understand that? can you even begin to decipher the depths of me? i think not.
i think the truest form of me appears only when i am sad. or feeling sombre. that's the real me. to speak in colour; what you see is ORANGE. but sometimes i think the real me is GRAY. not black, but meagre, bleak, gray.
i wish i can show that side of me. when i speak of life... death... mortality... when i write about emotions... social issues... when i speak of sorrow or joy... when i am... when i am feeling melancholic. and drunk on sadness.
maybe it's a societal oppression? the need to be the sunshine. yuck. i hate that. i HONESTLY do. i despise that term, the sunshine in the group, or terms such as those. for pete's sake, stop.
even the sun sets. and clouds do come. and rain still falls.
i don't blame it all on people around me. i myself, don't let that side of me out. so how can they know it exists?
but i think my issue here is... to know me first. to see all of me before making that moribund assumption of me being a bubbly person.
read my poetry. read between the lines of this blog. talk to me. bring up something to talk about that does not involve anyone being funny so that i won't laugh. don't blame me for laughing alot. that doesn't make me incapable of serious chats, that makes you, the clown.
maybe to some extent i shun serious sombrerity. but. i don't know. i just want people to see me. all sides of me. because i get such a single- dimensioned view.
i like watching sunrise. the change of colour in the sky. from black. deep suffocating endless black. to a dark blue. a lighter blue. an indigo of sorts. some violet streaks. it gets lighter and lighter and brighter... almost as though with each passing minute, there's more and more hope.
hope.
i don't believe in hoping. hoping leads to disappointment. i don't like commitment. tying myself down suffocates me and scares me. i don't like deaths. they produce a finality that i have never learnt to deal with.
i love the idea of love. but i think it's so vague and unsubstantiated. it's there... but not there. liminal. i think feeling is such a fluffy concept.
gut feelings, you just know it, etc. i don't believe in these.
i wish you can see me for all that i am. i'm more than just a happy person.
i wish i can show all of me too. i really want to. but we all know... we're all icebergs. so to reveal all of me is really a subjective concept.
i wish. i wish. i wish. wishing is like hoping. and we know what that leads to. what am i doing?
ok... this is farid ok? hahaha... this is at my house... he and hyaidi perasan hindustan... and lie down on my floor and did some pose... aiya watever. anyway hyaidi is cut off the pic. wahaha. anyway u can see his sweet smile but u cannot see that he's tall unless he's standing beside me or hyaidi haha sorry di anyway yes. this is farid. :D lalala...
ibarat air di daun keladi (yes am still on Warna 94.2 FM wahaha)
today went shopping for mum's birthday prezzies. got her a RED handbag and a RED shawl, a very GREEN frog and a PURPLE card.
the colours is to signify though she's 44, she's still a colourful and vibrant lady who rocks my world.
to all who has put her down, especially someone i know- you had no right, you never will. firstly, it is disrespectful, duh. secondly, she has done nothing to you, rather for ms someone i know *GASP!*, she had helped you out. i feel ashamed to have a friend like you once and allowed my mum to help you only to have you snit about her acting too young for her age, not acting her age.
if you ask me, which you won't cuz who am i right i'm just nobody yes i'm only the daughter of the woman you bitched about, that's none of your business. plus, it makes me and her very happy people so shut up.
i love you mum. down with all those people who put you down cuz only we know what we've been through and i respect you so much for that. you were a father and a mother and a brother and a sister to me. you'll always be my everything. thanks for being a friend when i'm down and out, thanks for being a mum and hugging me when i cry, thanks for being a sister and shopping with me, thanks for being a brother and watching stupid sports shows with me, thanks for being a father.... when i lost one.
i love you mum. thank you for giving me life and strength and knowledge and maturity. thank you for teaching me life's greatest mysteries. thank you. for being you.
..........
ok. :) no more emo stuff.
oh no. more. sorry. haha.
yeah... was talking to hyaidi... a close bud from GESS... ahhh... the memories there... i love that place. and the people i met there will remain the bestest friends i ever had...
chatted... faizal came into the story. and yeah. he is attached. it's confirmed. talking about it out loud and to someone else made me realize it's very real. but he is. and i'm happy for him that he finally got over whatshername. and we never could have happened... it's all so... complicated.
then we were talking bout our hari raya outings... how i never bring a guy along and everyone else does... then i always end up chatting with farid... the only other single soul... haha. then hyaidi started "ahem"ming... *rolls eyes*
FYI, farid is the guy i had a crush on when i 1st entered GESS. he was the 1st malay guy i saw when i stepped into that sweet ol' building near tanjong pagar railway station... it was "love" at first sight. then it waned off. then in sec. 3, it was revived. we never headed anywhere though. but we keep in touch. occassionally. :D
but yeah. he is like. my god of handsome. haha. he's TALL. DARK. HANDSOME. k not handsome la. sweet- looking. he has this very Malay face... appeals to the Johore roots in me. oh did i mention he's born in msia? yeah. batu pahat. my late dad was from muar. and this two places are really close and stuff... anyway. irrelevant. but ya. we bond to some extent. he's like the longest on- off crush i have. :) sweet.
oh well. while we're on being sweet, the apek came to nus today and we went to Holland V for some lunch. today being payday, he treated me to Swensens'. *beams* awwwwwwwwww. it's a biggie ok, for my dear apek to splurge like that. we even took a cab back to nus. *collective gasp* yeah anyway.
well. yeah. so i miss secondary school, my friends are turning 20 and more than that even *collective gasp, again*, i am wistfully wondering bout' farid who is always sweet and charming and tall and gives me a neckache by making me sit in the bus then he stands then we talk in the most uncompromising position ever, am letting go of any memories or hope i held together with faizal, am grinning in memory of swensens with apek, and in joy... that He has blessed my dearest mum with another year.
life. is what we make of it.
today went shopping for mum's birthday prezzies. got her a RED handbag and a RED shawl, a very GREEN frog and a PURPLE card.
the colours is to signify though she's 44, she's still a colourful and vibrant lady who rocks my world.
to all who has put her down, especially someone i know- you had no right, you never will. firstly, it is disrespectful, duh. secondly, she has done nothing to you, rather for ms someone i know *GASP!*, she had helped you out. i feel ashamed to have a friend like you once and allowed my mum to help you only to have you snit about her acting too young for her age, not acting her age.
if you ask me, which you won't cuz who am i right i'm just nobody yes i'm only the daughter of the woman you bitched about, that's none of your business. plus, it makes me and her very happy people so shut up.
i love you mum. down with all those people who put you down cuz only we know what we've been through and i respect you so much for that. you were a father and a mother and a brother and a sister to me. you'll always be my everything. thanks for being a friend when i'm down and out, thanks for being a mum and hugging me when i cry, thanks for being a sister and shopping with me, thanks for being a brother and watching stupid sports shows with me, thanks for being a father.... when i lost one.
i love you mum. thank you for giving me life and strength and knowledge and maturity. thank you for teaching me life's greatest mysteries. thank you. for being you.
..........
ok. :) no more emo stuff.
oh no. more. sorry. haha.
yeah... was talking to hyaidi... a close bud from GESS... ahhh... the memories there... i love that place. and the people i met there will remain the bestest friends i ever had...
chatted... faizal came into the story. and yeah. he is attached. it's confirmed. talking about it out loud and to someone else made me realize it's very real. but he is. and i'm happy for him that he finally got over whatshername. and we never could have happened... it's all so... complicated.
then we were talking bout our hari raya outings... how i never bring a guy along and everyone else does... then i always end up chatting with farid... the only other single soul... haha. then hyaidi started "ahem"ming... *rolls eyes*
FYI, farid is the guy i had a crush on when i 1st entered GESS. he was the 1st malay guy i saw when i stepped into that sweet ol' building near tanjong pagar railway station... it was "love" at first sight. then it waned off. then in sec. 3, it was revived. we never headed anywhere though. but we keep in touch. occassionally. :D
but yeah. he is like. my god of handsome. haha. he's TALL. DARK. HANDSOME. k not handsome la. sweet- looking. he has this very Malay face... appeals to the Johore roots in me. oh did i mention he's born in msia? yeah. batu pahat. my late dad was from muar. and this two places are really close and stuff... anyway. irrelevant. but ya. we bond to some extent. he's like the longest on- off crush i have. :) sweet.
oh well. while we're on being sweet, the apek came to nus today and we went to Holland V for some lunch. today being payday, he treated me to Swensens'. *beams* awwwwwwwwww. it's a biggie ok, for my dear apek to splurge like that. we even took a cab back to nus. *collective gasp* yeah anyway.
well. yeah. so i miss secondary school, my friends are turning 20 and more than that even *collective gasp, again*, i am wistfully wondering bout' farid who is always sweet and charming and tall and gives me a neckache by making me sit in the bus then he stands then we talk in the most uncompromising position ever, am letting go of any memories or hope i held together with faizal, am grinning in memory of swensens with apek, and in joy... that He has blessed my dearest mum with another year.
life. is what we make of it.
see. this is faizal. i officially shut "us" down today. talked to hyaidi... and he is now happily attached. and i realize we never would have worked. so goodbye faizal. you make it so hard sometimes...
Monday, October 11, 2004
here come's the bride...
went to a wedding at Marina Mandarin Hotel. nice nice. they had this 10- course thing even for muslim tables. other hotels should follow suit!
dessert was sago mango. then the makcik at the table asked the (very cute) boy serving us, "bubur ape ni?" (what porridge is this?) and he replied,
"bubur masjid." hahaha. (porridge from the mosque that's only available in the fasting month.)
he so cute. skali funny also. wah lao... not fair.
then the makcik said eh haven't fasting month got this porridge already ah. then he laughed. sigh... (fiza melts at this point.)
k i'm a bit not sane la hor. obviously.
but he so handsome!!!!!!! then. yeah.
then there was this guy who looked EXACTLY like faizal.
pang.
kept looking out for him throughout the night. then once, he passed by my table.
pang.
i just went breathless. he really looked like faizal. but i know he wasn't faizal. but he.
ahhhh. he brought back. time.
a time when. when i don't know.
shit SOOOO happens.
but aiya. zhafran is very handsome. oh shit. ya. haha. i saw the cute boy's name tag. obviously la! he pulled the chair for me when i came then he did the whole napkin on my lap thing. sweep me off my feet man.
then he kept topping up my coke. maybe he was trying to get me drunk and deluded enough to think he was so cute. well it worked.
but he was cute la. drunk or not. but i think he's attached. ke? no? aiya who cares la.
anyways. ya. mum bought me this $103 topshop dress just for the wedding. wahaha.
ohohoho. song! on radio!!!
biaaaaaaaaaaar..... cinta. terhalang, gunung dan samudera... akuuuuu tetap.... memegang janji ku padamu... biar jurang... yang terjauh ada didepan ku.... tak kan goyah... sumpahku kepada dirimu.... kita bagai kumbang dan bunga.... hatiku pasti, hatimu jua... namun... mengapa ada saja... yang benci.... tulus cinta kitaaaaaa.... jangan pisahkan.... aku dan dia.... tuhan tolongla... ku cinta dia... biarkan kami.. tetap bersama... didalam suka dan duka.... wooooooooooo oh oh oh oh.... haha.
wheeeee!!!!!!! you know fiza is in hari raya mode if her analogue radio station is now 94.2 FM. as in WARNA. as in MALAY station. in preparation of the raya songs coming up.
yay yay! dah nak raya!
ok la. gotta sleep. am seriously losing my marbles. *blob blob blob* *rollllll*
see.
arghhh! more nice malay songs. k la bye.
went to a wedding at Marina Mandarin Hotel. nice nice. they had this 10- course thing even for muslim tables. other hotels should follow suit!
dessert was sago mango. then the makcik at the table asked the (very cute) boy serving us, "bubur ape ni?" (what porridge is this?) and he replied,
"bubur masjid." hahaha. (porridge from the mosque that's only available in the fasting month.)
he so cute. skali funny also. wah lao... not fair.
then the makcik said eh haven't fasting month got this porridge already ah. then he laughed. sigh... (fiza melts at this point.)
k i'm a bit not sane la hor. obviously.
but he so handsome!!!!!!! then. yeah.
then there was this guy who looked EXACTLY like faizal.
pang.
kept looking out for him throughout the night. then once, he passed by my table.
pang.
i just went breathless. he really looked like faizal. but i know he wasn't faizal. but he.
ahhhh. he brought back. time.
a time when. when i don't know.
shit SOOOO happens.
but aiya. zhafran is very handsome. oh shit. ya. haha. i saw the cute boy's name tag. obviously la! he pulled the chair for me when i came then he did the whole napkin on my lap thing. sweep me off my feet man.
then he kept topping up my coke. maybe he was trying to get me drunk and deluded enough to think he was so cute. well it worked.
but he was cute la. drunk or not. but i think he's attached. ke? no? aiya who cares la.
anyways. ya. mum bought me this $103 topshop dress just for the wedding. wahaha.
ohohoho. song! on radio!!!
biaaaaaaaaaaar..... cinta. terhalang, gunung dan samudera... akuuuuu tetap.... memegang janji ku padamu... biar jurang... yang terjauh ada didepan ku.... tak kan goyah... sumpahku kepada dirimu.... kita bagai kumbang dan bunga.... hatiku pasti, hatimu jua... namun... mengapa ada saja... yang benci.... tulus cinta kitaaaaaa.... jangan pisahkan.... aku dan dia.... tuhan tolongla... ku cinta dia... biarkan kami.. tetap bersama... didalam suka dan duka.... wooooooooooo oh oh oh oh.... haha.
wheeeee!!!!!!! you know fiza is in hari raya mode if her analogue radio station is now 94.2 FM. as in WARNA. as in MALAY station. in preparation of the raya songs coming up.
yay yay! dah nak raya!
ok la. gotta sleep. am seriously losing my marbles. *blob blob blob* *rollllll*
see.
arghhh! more nice malay songs. k la bye.
Saturday, October 09, 2004
you think the mess clears up,
but no.
it just swirls into a marble effect dragging everything and anything else with it.
thanks alot.
stop telling me your problems. i'm selfish yes, i'm sick of hearing your depressing news.
if you have nothing positive and hopeful and good for me to hear, stop talking to me.
stop pouring your depressing news to me. go get yourself some friends, or start talking to your other friends about it. they'll probably be more understanding than me.
i'm sick of this sinking, drowning feeling. for once,i want to stay afloat and if that means pushing you off my boat, SO BE IT.
but no.
it just swirls into a marble effect dragging everything and anything else with it.
thanks alot.
stop telling me your problems. i'm selfish yes, i'm sick of hearing your depressing news.
if you have nothing positive and hopeful and good for me to hear, stop talking to me.
stop pouring your depressing news to me. go get yourself some friends, or start talking to your other friends about it. they'll probably be more understanding than me.
i'm sick of this sinking, drowning feeling. for once,i want to stay afloat and if that means pushing you off my boat, SO BE IT.
Friday, October 08, 2004
whee.
am back from a long happy day.
first thing up- essay conference with andrew leng. that went ok la.
then cdc. i have so much to say... i don't know where to start. the state of the place is so mediocre as compared to all these technologically- advanced hospitals we have in SG... it honestly looks like just another malaysian village... cotton curtains unwashed for years, wooden dining tables, grubbly sofas, blackened chairs... it's seriously a village. all wood and cement. then they made into wards for HIV patients. it's beyond ridiculous. it's inhuman. people there are really dying... they all have such faint candles lighting up their lives and all we can give is a shackled- up place. i feel disappointed and disgusted at myself for being so self- absorbed and ignorant. this lady from Bandung had two sons, a 5- yr- old and a 3- yr- old. one was schooling. the younger one was there. and he was so... young. he was shy at first then he opened up and played a little. then the uncles at the place teased him a little... then there was an uncle who played with him for awhile before going back... then after that he said bye- bye. and the boy said "pu yao bye- bye". he insisted he doesn't want "bye- bye". and when the uncle really left, he cried. he was so emotionally attached to everyone there. and everytime someone leaves, it hurts. it really isn't the best place to be in when you're a 3- yr- old boy.
then hafiz... we met at novena... then headed town... ate this yummy chocolate thing called opera diva from McCafe. had their ice chocolate too. not bad... pretty good stuff. cleared up some things with him... hopefully things will turn out for the best.
then hana at constant cravings... chatted a lil... then headed to ikea... haha... where we went crazy. most of my sentences started with "OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS!" ensued by several finger- pointing. haha. my new room's gonna be gorgeous. :)
oh yea. am looking at new homes. am moving. house is sold and currently looking at places probably in the admiralty area. have decided that if i do get it, i'll stop dorming. save money and get my licence over and done with. then stay at home in my new perfect room. last house with my family... before i get.... ulp. married. eeeeeeeps.
anyway. am back in my dorm. tired. feet. argh.
i'm not funny anymore. so sad. haha. never mind la. who says you must be funny everyday right. haha.
k whatever.
am back from a long happy day.
first thing up- essay conference with andrew leng. that went ok la.
then cdc. i have so much to say... i don't know where to start. the state of the place is so mediocre as compared to all these technologically- advanced hospitals we have in SG... it honestly looks like just another malaysian village... cotton curtains unwashed for years, wooden dining tables, grubbly sofas, blackened chairs... it's seriously a village. all wood and cement. then they made into wards for HIV patients. it's beyond ridiculous. it's inhuman. people there are really dying... they all have such faint candles lighting up their lives and all we can give is a shackled- up place. i feel disappointed and disgusted at myself for being so self- absorbed and ignorant. this lady from Bandung had two sons, a 5- yr- old and a 3- yr- old. one was schooling. the younger one was there. and he was so... young. he was shy at first then he opened up and played a little. then the uncles at the place teased him a little... then there was an uncle who played with him for awhile before going back... then after that he said bye- bye. and the boy said "pu yao bye- bye". he insisted he doesn't want "bye- bye". and when the uncle really left, he cried. he was so emotionally attached to everyone there. and everytime someone leaves, it hurts. it really isn't the best place to be in when you're a 3- yr- old boy.
then hafiz... we met at novena... then headed town... ate this yummy chocolate thing called opera diva from McCafe. had their ice chocolate too. not bad... pretty good stuff. cleared up some things with him... hopefully things will turn out for the best.
then hana at constant cravings... chatted a lil... then headed to ikea... haha... where we went crazy. most of my sentences started with "OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS!" ensued by several finger- pointing. haha. my new room's gonna be gorgeous. :)
oh yea. am looking at new homes. am moving. house is sold and currently looking at places probably in the admiralty area. have decided that if i do get it, i'll stop dorming. save money and get my licence over and done with. then stay at home in my new perfect room. last house with my family... before i get.... ulp. married. eeeeeeeps.
anyway. am back in my dorm. tired. feet. argh.
i'm not funny anymore. so sad. haha. never mind la. who says you must be funny everyday right. haha.
k whatever.
Thursday, October 07, 2004
did i fall in love for nothing?
how do you teach your heart it's a crime, to fall in love again...
i thought that you might have, some advice to give, on how to be, insensitive.
random random random.
haaa... tuition in a while. listening to my cd... favourites. hence the snippets of songs.
haha. now it's hold me now. was listening to it yesterday on hakim's phone halfway. and then we rushed down the bus and haiya. long story. anyway he sang it horribly. lol.
he just sang the ooooh part. that was bad enough.
anyway... yeah.
kristy saw me just now and she went "oh my god woman you're attached! right?" ............
yeah me and kris have this gossip sessions la. where we update each other on our lives... today's session was bout me. and i was kinda quiet when she saw me so she jumped to the very irrelevant and crazy conclusion aforementioned.
i don't think i'll ever be attached again... until it's like time to get married. why not enjoy some freedom for now ey?
but it gets miserable sometimes. cuz all these couples are so in- your- face. yesterday i concluded that it was all a conspiracy... that all the couples were intentionally in my face. hah... yeah. whatever.
i see couples in school... outside... they don't bother me la... cuz i know we're all happy where ever we are.
i enjoy being single... a freedom to spontaneity... like suddenly wanting to go sentosa and i don't have to wait for the day the boy is free. i can just.... GO.
i guess... relationship... provides constancy... constant male companionship. why male? why company? i get along better with males. but i don't get lonely. nor do i need much constancy.
but at some point of time in life... we all seek constance. for now i'm not sure i want it yet. at the moment constancy seems to hint at boredom.
but i still enjoy a male companion. haha. what am i talking about?!!!! geez.
i guess. well. i guess i miss that secondary school sensation of being in a relationship. hmm. i should get a trophy boyfriend. you know. like how it was cool to have a bf from ITE or a mat motor or sth when u were in sec sch...
bleaaaaah. but i'm too far gone... too desensitised to know and feel and sense it when a guy likes me. i am pretty much immune to affections and love and whatnots from the opposite sex. yet i want it. but how would i know i have it if i can't feel it right?
i want a guy who can make me laugh and yet allow me to have an intellectual exchange with. i want a guy who drives, or at least can send me to and fro somewhere. who has time i guess, to send me to and fro. i want a guy tall enough to make me feel secure. i want a guy big enough to make me feel protected. i want a guy who is religious enough to guide me to the right path but not so anal that he makes me wear a gunny sack in public.
i ask for so much from life. i am grateful, God, for all your gifts. but can you give me an answer to why relationships are always a disaster in my life?
how do you teach your heart it's a crime, to fall in love again...
i thought that you might have, some advice to give, on how to be, insensitive.
random random random.
haaa... tuition in a while. listening to my cd... favourites. hence the snippets of songs.
haha. now it's hold me now. was listening to it yesterday on hakim's phone halfway. and then we rushed down the bus and haiya. long story. anyway he sang it horribly. lol.
he just sang the ooooh part. that was bad enough.
anyway... yeah.
kristy saw me just now and she went "oh my god woman you're attached! right?" ............
yeah me and kris have this gossip sessions la. where we update each other on our lives... today's session was bout me. and i was kinda quiet when she saw me so she jumped to the very irrelevant and crazy conclusion aforementioned.
i don't think i'll ever be attached again... until it's like time to get married. why not enjoy some freedom for now ey?
but it gets miserable sometimes. cuz all these couples are so in- your- face. yesterday i concluded that it was all a conspiracy... that all the couples were intentionally in my face. hah... yeah. whatever.
i see couples in school... outside... they don't bother me la... cuz i know we're all happy where ever we are.
i enjoy being single... a freedom to spontaneity... like suddenly wanting to go sentosa and i don't have to wait for the day the boy is free. i can just.... GO.
i guess... relationship... provides constancy... constant male companionship. why male? why company? i get along better with males. but i don't get lonely. nor do i need much constancy.
but at some point of time in life... we all seek constance. for now i'm not sure i want it yet. at the moment constancy seems to hint at boredom.
but i still enjoy a male companion. haha. what am i talking about?!!!! geez.
i guess. well. i guess i miss that secondary school sensation of being in a relationship. hmm. i should get a trophy boyfriend. you know. like how it was cool to have a bf from ITE or a mat motor or sth when u were in sec sch...
bleaaaaah. but i'm too far gone... too desensitised to know and feel and sense it when a guy likes me. i am pretty much immune to affections and love and whatnots from the opposite sex. yet i want it. but how would i know i have it if i can't feel it right?
i want a guy who can make me laugh and yet allow me to have an intellectual exchange with. i want a guy who drives, or at least can send me to and fro somewhere. who has time i guess, to send me to and fro. i want a guy tall enough to make me feel secure. i want a guy big enough to make me feel protected. i want a guy who is religious enough to guide me to the right path but not so anal that he makes me wear a gunny sack in public.
i ask for so much from life. i am grateful, God, for all your gifts. but can you give me an answer to why relationships are always a disaster in my life?
went sentosa with hakim yesterday....
i'm tanned and happy.
i'm really tired. maybe it's time to head to the doc for new anemia medication.
maybe not.
humm. ms tutorial in 20 minutes. ack...
i'm tanned and happy.
i'm really tired. maybe it's time to head to the doc for new anemia medication.
maybe not.
humm. ms tutorial in 20 minutes. ack...
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
just got back...
taught tuition. farhan. 12 yr old kid. last paper this friday = last tuition this thursday.
anyway... i realized.
10 days to ramadhan.
1 month and 10 days to syawal.
1 month and 14 days to start of exams.
1 month and 25 days to my departure to thailand.
1 month and 26 days to Hana's birthday.
2 months and 2 days to my 2nd year with hafiz.
2 months and 16 days to hafiz's birthday.
2 months 25 days to 2005.
time FLIES. i am TELLING you it has wings and a cloak that makes it invisible and it just disappears or fly right over you.
i still feel very much like a freshman. very very. i am not ready to grow.
please let me wallow and stagnate. give me a moment and let me freeze it so that it'll last a little longer.
give me the time that has passed.
give me the past.
i don't have any regrets. i don't look back longingly i don't wish to turn back time.
i just wish to live it all again. over and over again so that i don't have to move on.
i want to stop falling and picking myself up and only to fall again. i'm sick of gathering courage to move on.
let me be.
taught tuition. farhan. 12 yr old kid. last paper this friday = last tuition this thursday.
anyway... i realized.
10 days to ramadhan.
1 month and 10 days to syawal.
1 month and 14 days to start of exams.
1 month and 25 days to my departure to thailand.
1 month and 26 days to Hana's birthday.
2 months and 2 days to my 2nd year with hafiz.
2 months and 16 days to hafiz's birthday.
2 months 25 days to 2005.
time FLIES. i am TELLING you it has wings and a cloak that makes it invisible and it just disappears or fly right over you.
i still feel very much like a freshman. very very. i am not ready to grow.
please let me wallow and stagnate. give me a moment and let me freeze it so that it'll last a little longer.
give me the time that has passed.
give me the past.
i don't have any regrets. i don't look back longingly i don't wish to turn back time.
i just wish to live it all again. over and over again so that i don't have to move on.
i want to stop falling and picking myself up and only to fall again. i'm sick of gathering courage to move on.
let me be.
Monday, October 04, 2004
back in my dorm... was at home for the past few days. that few days being friday, saturday and sunday.
felt good. everytime i go home it's like getting my batteries charged. then i come back to dorm, slog it out, then home again. lalala. as always, another cycle. isn't that what life is all about?
friday i met mom after tuition to have dinner at pizza hut. then i was too lazy to go back to my dorm so i just slept in my room. which is as warm and welcoming. as always...
dug through my old stuffs. i have several shoeboxes. yeah i'm shoebox person. so hadi gets a box, imran gets a box, hafiz gets a box. firdh has too little stuff so he goes together with hadi's big box.
by some weird twist of events, i wound up with imran's box. a blue adidas box. which was the box of my brown limited eds sneakers that i wore in Yr1. when i was with him. of course.
i read through it all. my diaries, his cards, small notes... i read my recovery to sanity after he left. each day i penned down my thoughts... usually in the comforts of the student lounge. then somedays he'll enter the student lounge and i'll walk off to somewhere else to continue writing. i usually ended up in secluded staircases. one was the stairs leading up to the guitar clubroom. hah. go figure that one out.
then i just sat back and let the memories like sea waves, wash around me. us singing together during hari raya. heh. at least we got one together. one glorious one it was. how every morning at 6.45 a.m. sharp at bukit batok last carriage we'll meet to go GESS together. how we irritated hadi so with our singing. how one day during recess and the bell rang and we very suddenly and coincidentally in sync broke into "ding dong bell pussy's in the well". hah... memories.
they say memories can make or break you. memories of imran does neither to me.
i remember how i went for PPP. that malay theatre thang. where he was acting. argh. how i hated watching him. it just hurt! to see him there. in front of me in my face not away not looking elsewhere. he was there for me to just grab and runaway with. then at the end when i met with the cast... and him. and we talked a little. those stilted words... formal, fake- casual chatter... i hated it. yet i wanted to savour every moment of it cuz i know we might never talk again. WE! never talk again!!! we were the two most talkative THINGS in gess and we got together it was like... i don't know. we were different. we were special. we knew it and we were so cocky about it. haha. yeah. guess we were.
we were never simple. we were never your average day- to- day couple. we had so much in common that we even argued who came up with the idea first. and he was one of the few who could sing all those really ancient malay songs with me.
whatever it was that we had, it was so STRONG. but i don't know if it was love. but it was definitely strong.
we shared. a bond, a belief, a liking. we loved life and we seized it and made it ours.
and then.
and then he left.
and i kinda forgot how it really is. to live.
i really wish he's happy. i think he is. so am i. we all got what we wanted in the end, didn't we, imran?
felt good. everytime i go home it's like getting my batteries charged. then i come back to dorm, slog it out, then home again. lalala. as always, another cycle. isn't that what life is all about?
friday i met mom after tuition to have dinner at pizza hut. then i was too lazy to go back to my dorm so i just slept in my room. which is as warm and welcoming. as always...
dug through my old stuffs. i have several shoeboxes. yeah i'm shoebox person. so hadi gets a box, imran gets a box, hafiz gets a box. firdh has too little stuff so he goes together with hadi's big box.
by some weird twist of events, i wound up with imran's box. a blue adidas box. which was the box of my brown limited eds sneakers that i wore in Yr1. when i was with him. of course.
i read through it all. my diaries, his cards, small notes... i read my recovery to sanity after he left. each day i penned down my thoughts... usually in the comforts of the student lounge. then somedays he'll enter the student lounge and i'll walk off to somewhere else to continue writing. i usually ended up in secluded staircases. one was the stairs leading up to the guitar clubroom. hah. go figure that one out.
then i just sat back and let the memories like sea waves, wash around me. us singing together during hari raya. heh. at least we got one together. one glorious one it was. how every morning at 6.45 a.m. sharp at bukit batok last carriage we'll meet to go GESS together. how we irritated hadi so with our singing. how one day during recess and the bell rang and we very suddenly and coincidentally in sync broke into "ding dong bell pussy's in the well". hah... memories.
they say memories can make or break you. memories of imran does neither to me.
i remember how i went for PPP. that malay theatre thang. where he was acting. argh. how i hated watching him. it just hurt! to see him there. in front of me in my face not away not looking elsewhere. he was there for me to just grab and runaway with. then at the end when i met with the cast... and him. and we talked a little. those stilted words... formal, fake- casual chatter... i hated it. yet i wanted to savour every moment of it cuz i know we might never talk again. WE! never talk again!!! we were the two most talkative THINGS in gess and we got together it was like... i don't know. we were different. we were special. we knew it and we were so cocky about it. haha. yeah. guess we were.
we were never simple. we were never your average day- to- day couple. we had so much in common that we even argued who came up with the idea first. and he was one of the few who could sing all those really ancient malay songs with me.
whatever it was that we had, it was so STRONG. but i don't know if it was love. but it was definitely strong.
we shared. a bond, a belief, a liking. we loved life and we seized it and made it ours.
and then.
and then he left.
and i kinda forgot how it really is. to live.
i really wish he's happy. i think he is. so am i. we all got what we wanted in the end, didn't we, imran?
Friday, October 01, 2004
sheesh.
was supposed to wake up at 8 a.m. reach CDC at 10 a.m. leave at 12 p.m. and reach PJC at 1 p.m. and get my notes then head for tuition at 3.30 p.m.
timecheck: 2.24 p.m. and i just woke up.
good lord.
this is what happens when 1- i don't sleep for 2 days and 2- i have anemia.
oh well.
at least i'm not late for tuition. been postponed to 4. lalala...
guess i gotta take my lit notes from eddie on monday then.
oh ya... yesterday.
met the hafizlimbelo the mungen at 1.30 p.m. at buona vista... haha. we decided to go to town for lunch instead of holland v burger king... cuz i needed a break from my surroundings.
so we went... then lunched at CONSTANT CRAVINGS! yummy. had spaghetti he had chicken. mmmmmmm.
then we wanted to watch a movie. this was all very spontaneous cuz i remembered white chicks opened yesterday so i wanted to watch.
turned out abang yazid was watching it too at 3 p.m. so it was just nice for us. went to get tickets and in we go...
the movie was so funny that at the end of it all i was sitting cross- legged cuz i laughed so much. it's seriously funny. really. plotless of course, well there is a plot but it's forgettable in the humour of it all, but really entertaining.
FIVE STARS!!!!
then we went toysRus. so fun! it had all these halloween stuff and hafiz and me were trying it on. didn't bring my digicam... :( but i did have my phone so i'll post it up when i got the whole infrared thingy worked out.
there's a pic of me in a witch's hat that was so high and pointy and him in the SCREAM mask. hahaha.
oh oh there's also a pic of me that he took that is like... aiya dunno how to explain. then there's a pic of him drinking from the glass and it's finished and the bottom is foggy and his nose is MAGNIFIED. so can see his lubang hidung. hahahahaaahaha.
then we wandered around and i wanted to buy jenga, jenga extreme, uno stacko, scrabble deluxe, monopoly, mc donald's cash register and what nots. but no. i didn't buy anything. but i will go back for my banana pen. it's so nice!
k then we decided we were a littlwe hungry still so we went to the Starbucks near orchard parade hotel.
had a chocolate muffin the size of my TWO fists. and thomas kemper root beer. mmmmm.
then walked back to orchard mrt cuz i had tuition. then we passed by borders and since i had time and we always have time for books we went in.
and of course, i became LATE for tuition. haha.
oh i forgot to mention how before i had the lunch i was really tired and weak- ish... then makcik put loads of meat in my spaghetti and i became all hyper and high and overactive and started doing boxing stances with hafiz and what nots. he said i was giving him a migraine with all my quick and sudden movements. wahahaha.
ok la now i'm late for my next tuition.
gee i gotta do sth bout my time management.
hahaha.
was supposed to wake up at 8 a.m. reach CDC at 10 a.m. leave at 12 p.m. and reach PJC at 1 p.m. and get my notes then head for tuition at 3.30 p.m.
timecheck: 2.24 p.m. and i just woke up.
good lord.
this is what happens when 1- i don't sleep for 2 days and 2- i have anemia.
oh well.
at least i'm not late for tuition. been postponed to 4. lalala...
guess i gotta take my lit notes from eddie on monday then.
oh ya... yesterday.
met the hafizlimbelo the mungen at 1.30 p.m. at buona vista... haha. we decided to go to town for lunch instead of holland v burger king... cuz i needed a break from my surroundings.
so we went... then lunched at CONSTANT CRAVINGS! yummy. had spaghetti he had chicken. mmmmmmm.
then we wanted to watch a movie. this was all very spontaneous cuz i remembered white chicks opened yesterday so i wanted to watch.
turned out abang yazid was watching it too at 3 p.m. so it was just nice for us. went to get tickets and in we go...
the movie was so funny that at the end of it all i was sitting cross- legged cuz i laughed so much. it's seriously funny. really. plotless of course, well there is a plot but it's forgettable in the humour of it all, but really entertaining.
FIVE STARS!!!!
then we went toysRus. so fun! it had all these halloween stuff and hafiz and me were trying it on. didn't bring my digicam... :( but i did have my phone so i'll post it up when i got the whole infrared thingy worked out.
there's a pic of me in a witch's hat that was so high and pointy and him in the SCREAM mask. hahaha.
oh oh there's also a pic of me that he took that is like... aiya dunno how to explain. then there's a pic of him drinking from the glass and it's finished and the bottom is foggy and his nose is MAGNIFIED. so can see his lubang hidung. hahahahaaahaha.
then we wandered around and i wanted to buy jenga, jenga extreme, uno stacko, scrabble deluxe, monopoly, mc donald's cash register and what nots. but no. i didn't buy anything. but i will go back for my banana pen. it's so nice!
k then we decided we were a littlwe hungry still so we went to the Starbucks near orchard parade hotel.
had a chocolate muffin the size of my TWO fists. and thomas kemper root beer. mmmmm.
then walked back to orchard mrt cuz i had tuition. then we passed by borders and since i had time and we always have time for books we went in.
and of course, i became LATE for tuition. haha.
oh i forgot to mention how before i had the lunch i was really tired and weak- ish... then makcik put loads of meat in my spaghetti and i became all hyper and high and overactive and started doing boxing stances with hafiz and what nots. he said i was giving him a migraine with all my quick and sudden movements. wahahaha.
ok la now i'm late for my next tuition.
gee i gotta do sth bout my time management.
hahaha.