I am solitary by choice, not circumstances.
I have friends, I'm not lonely.
I have love, I do have a heart.
I can be cold, I am made to be stronger than most.
I can be quiet, I was born to be the only child.
I can be funny and loud, I was taught to always have fun.
I can be anything I want to be. Only because I can.
Hana
Mr. Udders
Maya's Baked Goodies
Nazri
Nadiah
Laremy the Cow
Aida
Ruz
Ed Koh
Travels
New York I
New York II
New York III
New York IV
New York V
Melbourne I
Melbourne II
Melbourne III
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Melbourne V
Liverpool
London
Paris
Lisbon
Barcelona
Fez
Milan
Pisa
Rome
Rome/ Vatican/ Venice
Venice/ Vienna
Prague
Berlin
Amsterdam
Europe In Lomo
Mr. Udders
Maya's Baked Goodies
Nazri
Nadiah
Laremy the Cow
Aida
Ruz
Ed Koh
Travels
New York I
New York II
New York III
New York IV
New York V
Melbourne I
Melbourne II
Melbourne III
Melbourne IV
Melbourne V
Liverpool
London
Paris
Lisbon
Barcelona
Fez
Milan
Pisa
Rome
Rome/ Vatican/ Venice
Venice/ Vienna
Prague
Berlin
Amsterdam
Europe In Lomo
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Bituwin -
Blogskin
Edited by Yours Truly.
Blog Title is E.B. White's famous words, rephrased.
Thursday, July 31, 2003
what's on the other side of the mystery wedge? it could be a bankrupt. [or a car.]
what are the chances i'll break- up with him? seriously.
at the rate i'm going, probably never.
what's the worse that could happen?
we'll just live happily ever after.
hmm.
neck is still crickety. tsk, tsk. it's very disturbing.
i don't usually care about my health... but my neck?
it's preetttyyyyy... scary.
hope its nothing serious.
wouldn't want to go to the sinseh recommended by bryan and huimin.
sounds FATAL.
CRRRRRRRRRRAAAACK.
ack. that hurts. moving on.
i've paid for the dress... anytime now!
gotta alter it before i get to wear it but hey...
it'll be worth the wait.
10 days to fireworks, pan pacific... and 8 months.
*shudders*
not in a negative way... but wow.
it's been long.
we definitely have been through lots of ups and downs.
more ups, i guess. r'else why would i stay?
of date, i've had say... 6 boyfriends?
only two were serious of course.
and i must admit... hafiz is the best yet far.
his patience is almost... unbelievable.
he has his flaws of course... but for what he is, i love all of it.
oh dear. i believe i've offended a particular cynical friend of mine.
sorry!
school was normal today.
extremely normal to the point of possibly nice.
xcept' for a few setbacks here and there which managed to be settled... school was fine.
of course, i did skip history.
i might have a different opinion of today entirely if i had went.
been collecting the results slips... still coming in dribs and drabs.
it's quite annoying actually. today was the last day and still there's people who forget.
as it is, there are people who are absent more often than they are in school...
haiz. how in the world will i ever get all 20 results slip...
anyway... got back my class pics.
niceeee. i love the smiles all around.
though i might not be able to look at the whole picture with as much pleasure and joy as possible, i guess the lessons i learn as a person and how it made me change and develop as an adult will always be valuable.
with that... i'll start studying. sigh.
what a bore.
what are the chances i'll break- up with him? seriously.
at the rate i'm going, probably never.
what's the worse that could happen?
we'll just live happily ever after.
hmm.
neck is still crickety. tsk, tsk. it's very disturbing.
i don't usually care about my health... but my neck?
it's preetttyyyyy... scary.
hope its nothing serious.
wouldn't want to go to the sinseh recommended by bryan and huimin.
sounds FATAL.
CRRRRRRRRRRAAAACK.
ack. that hurts. moving on.
i've paid for the dress... anytime now!
gotta alter it before i get to wear it but hey...
it'll be worth the wait.
10 days to fireworks, pan pacific... and 8 months.
*shudders*
not in a negative way... but wow.
it's been long.
we definitely have been through lots of ups and downs.
more ups, i guess. r'else why would i stay?
of date, i've had say... 6 boyfriends?
only two were serious of course.
and i must admit... hafiz is the best yet far.
his patience is almost... unbelievable.
he has his flaws of course... but for what he is, i love all of it.
oh dear. i believe i've offended a particular cynical friend of mine.
sorry!
school was normal today.
extremely normal to the point of possibly nice.
xcept' for a few setbacks here and there which managed to be settled... school was fine.
of course, i did skip history.
i might have a different opinion of today entirely if i had went.
been collecting the results slips... still coming in dribs and drabs.
it's quite annoying actually. today was the last day and still there's people who forget.
as it is, there are people who are absent more often than they are in school...
haiz. how in the world will i ever get all 20 results slip...
anyway... got back my class pics.
niceeee. i love the smiles all around.
though i might not be able to look at the whole picture with as much pleasure and joy as possible, i guess the lessons i learn as a person and how it made me change and develop as an adult will always be valuable.
with that... i'll start studying. sigh.
what a bore.
Wednesday, July 30, 2003
i got the dress! i got it! i got it!
yay!
soooooo happy. got the dress. will be transferring the cash tmr.
will probably get it by this weekend.
whee!
must alter it first.
after that..... WOO HOO! i'll probably try it on everyday. haha.
school was ok today.
sigh. ok... it wasn't really.
i kinda... hurt my neck. yes, frisbee has overthrown free- falling as THE most dangerous sport in the world.
no, it doesn't slice ur neck. or cut ur palm. or even hit ur head.
NOOOO. but it brings out the animal in u.
watch a05 play and u'll know what i mean.
when i sat- out for the 2nd half of the game, i realized how proper it was when played with the proper rules.
to a05: ULTIMATE frisbee means NO HOLDS BARRED. no disqualification, everything's allowed, including wrestling.
only the guys were supposed to wrestle but hey, its a class game. monkey see monkey do.
everyone turned out to be extra brutal today. WHOA.
in an attempt to catch a frisbee flying above my head, fahrur and hafiz ran towards each other SIDEWAYS, crashing into ME- who apparently is too SHORT cuz they just slammed into me like i was thin air- making me fall sideways.
fahrur tripped on my legs and hafiz tumbled over me.
in an attempt to proceed with the game, hafiz accidentally stepped on my neck.
i was still on the floor... so its justifiable. unless it was on purpose of course.
haha. so i continued playing... but the frisbee kept flying up high, and it began to really hurt my neck to keep looking up.
during the water break, i told mrs loh i couldn't look up. and she was like, oh neck problem, ah giddiness, numbness, etc etc.
i thought i was going to be paralyzed the way she went on. heh.
but i'm ok now. but it aches when i turn too fast or too much.
went to watch rob zombie's House of 1000 Corpses. good god. it was HORRIBLE.
do not watch it. its a waste of money, time, and all else. its mindless, just plotless mind- blowing amount of gore and blood.
i tried to view it in a light of humour and laughed away. hafiz, unfortunately, was traumatized.
we were so edgy after the movie. haha.
everything began looking scary. stupid movie.
we ate shaker fries and drank coke.
realized his ez- link was empty. so we walked to his place.
yup. you heard me right. we walked. from lot 1, to his place, which is near Bukit Panjang Plaza.
actually it wasn't as far as it sounds.
and it was fun.
saw andrew coming back from his "self- studying" thingy in school. if u ask me, he looked like he just woke up. haha.
he was ASTOUNDED that we were walking. oh well.
came back home exhausted but pleased.
i sorta... er... how do i put this without sounding freaky.
you know the way we muslims show respect to the elderly? we "shake hands"? by like kissing or sth their hands?
yeah. it kinda shows respect. not an EROTIC move ah, please.
anyway.
did that to hafiz. cuz lately i've been really rude to him and not giving him the respect he deserves.
he was pleasantly surprised.
oh well. i just thought he deserved it.
gonna go mug now......
BWAAAHAAAAHAAAAAA!
yay!
soooooo happy. got the dress. will be transferring the cash tmr.
will probably get it by this weekend.
whee!
must alter it first.
after that..... WOO HOO! i'll probably try it on everyday. haha.
school was ok today.
sigh. ok... it wasn't really.
i kinda... hurt my neck. yes, frisbee has overthrown free- falling as THE most dangerous sport in the world.
no, it doesn't slice ur neck. or cut ur palm. or even hit ur head.
NOOOO. but it brings out the animal in u.
watch a05 play and u'll know what i mean.
when i sat- out for the 2nd half of the game, i realized how proper it was when played with the proper rules.
to a05: ULTIMATE frisbee means NO HOLDS BARRED. no disqualification, everything's allowed, including wrestling.
only the guys were supposed to wrestle but hey, its a class game. monkey see monkey do.
everyone turned out to be extra brutal today. WHOA.
in an attempt to catch a frisbee flying above my head, fahrur and hafiz ran towards each other SIDEWAYS, crashing into ME- who apparently is too SHORT cuz they just slammed into me like i was thin air- making me fall sideways.
fahrur tripped on my legs and hafiz tumbled over me.
in an attempt to proceed with the game, hafiz accidentally stepped on my neck.
i was still on the floor... so its justifiable. unless it was on purpose of course.
haha. so i continued playing... but the frisbee kept flying up high, and it began to really hurt my neck to keep looking up.
during the water break, i told mrs loh i couldn't look up. and she was like, oh neck problem, ah giddiness, numbness, etc etc.
i thought i was going to be paralyzed the way she went on. heh.
but i'm ok now. but it aches when i turn too fast or too much.
went to watch rob zombie's House of 1000 Corpses. good god. it was HORRIBLE.
do not watch it. its a waste of money, time, and all else. its mindless, just plotless mind- blowing amount of gore and blood.
i tried to view it in a light of humour and laughed away. hafiz, unfortunately, was traumatized.
we were so edgy after the movie. haha.
everything began looking scary. stupid movie.
we ate shaker fries and drank coke.
realized his ez- link was empty. so we walked to his place.
yup. you heard me right. we walked. from lot 1, to his place, which is near Bukit Panjang Plaza.
actually it wasn't as far as it sounds.
and it was fun.
saw andrew coming back from his "self- studying" thingy in school. if u ask me, he looked like he just woke up. haha.
he was ASTOUNDED that we were walking. oh well.
came back home exhausted but pleased.
i sorta... er... how do i put this without sounding freaky.
you know the way we muslims show respect to the elderly? we "shake hands"? by like kissing or sth their hands?
yeah. it kinda shows respect. not an EROTIC move ah, please.
anyway.
did that to hafiz. cuz lately i've been really rude to him and not giving him the respect he deserves.
he was pleasantly surprised.
oh well. i just thought he deserved it.
gonna go mug now......
BWAAAHAAAAHAAAAAA!
Tuesday, July 29, 2003
figuring myself out
correction. need TO figure myself out.
feeling… disconnected.
from myself, from my inner faiths and beliefs.
maybe because I’m unable to pray [it’s the time of the month] thus I feel unable to communicate to my Saviour.
but then again.
it’s a lot of other things.
my dread of school, the a levels, the tests, the homework…
my procrastination. my self- denial.
I’m become delusional.
I’m disillusioned by the fact that in 3 months time, it’ll all be over and nothing can change that.
its all not sinking in. its floating somewhere up there… not in but definitely having great weight that is further pressurizing itself onto my mind.
but its just not going in.
and that’s frustrating. I’m exasperating myself.
I KNOW I need to start now, start work start start start.
but I just won’t! I just can’t! I push myself to it, it goes in, then it goes out again.
the body is there but not the… spirit. the will. the strength and desire to go on and succeed.
I won’t make it.
at the rate I’m going I won’t make it.
and that scares the freaking shit out of me.
correction. need TO figure myself out.
feeling… disconnected.
from myself, from my inner faiths and beliefs.
maybe because I’m unable to pray [it’s the time of the month] thus I feel unable to communicate to my Saviour.
but then again.
it’s a lot of other things.
my dread of school, the a levels, the tests, the homework…
my procrastination. my self- denial.
I’m become delusional.
I’m disillusioned by the fact that in 3 months time, it’ll all be over and nothing can change that.
its all not sinking in. its floating somewhere up there… not in but definitely having great weight that is further pressurizing itself onto my mind.
but its just not going in.
and that’s frustrating. I’m exasperating myself.
I KNOW I need to start now, start work start start start.
but I just won’t! I just can’t! I push myself to it, it goes in, then it goes out again.
the body is there but not the… spirit. the will. the strength and desire to go on and succeed.
I won’t make it.
at the rate I’m going I won’t make it.
and that scares the freaking shit out of me.
Monday, July 28, 2003
well shake it up baby now!
have transferred the $$$ to the seller's account for a US Ref top. vintage-y, but nothing beats this 1940s- inspired Tosphop dress that i've bidded for. its auctions closes tmr. hope to get it. pray for me. i know no other more perfect dress to wear on my birthday to watch animal farm. sigh. with all this mugging, studying and constant depression, my birthday and national day are definitely two days that can't come any sooner.
anway my room rocks. hafiz thinks so too. its so bachelor's pad. we made cheese and egg sandwiches and devoured them in my room. i have this inflatable sofa and... its mega comfy. with the red & yellow beadings dangling by my window and the red & white sofa itself, along with my retro bedside lamps and bedside table... we felt trasported to the 60s. just for campy value, i played my beatles best hits cd. it felt good to just bounce on my bed and sing some good ol' beatles while hafiz choked on his sandwich laughing at me. nice afternoon.
school was mentally exhausting. forex, john donne's perception of love, sea history exam format... whooooa. me, hafiz, bryan and fahrur were planning our bachelor's pad[s] during history lecture. at least bryan and fahrur were. me n hafiz were planning our home. haha. we know we might not last but it just happens to be that we both want 2- room HDB flats for our first home so it seemed harmless to plan it together. it was quite fun. figuring out where the kitchen goes, where the room is, where the fridge is, the washing machine... try it. its kinda fun.
have got TWO econs tests tomorrow. all i can say is, thank god i've finished my gp essay. will mug for econs later tonight. sigh. before & after friends, of course.
will be slacking for now... good luck those taking the test tmr!
just for the heck of it, SCHOOL SUCKS!
p.s. MRISI says hi.
-updates- see my dream dress. =] yahoo auctions- item ID 75817105. its quite a hassle. sorry! but my online album has gone bonkers.
p.p.s. apparently, i have $66.99 in my ordinary a/c, $20.24 in my special a/c and $30.37 in my medisave a/c. all this according to this flimsy green paper i receive from the freakin CPF Board every mth. now if only i could withdraw all that frigging money, i wouldn't be eating bread and water everyday, would i? blithering CPF.
have transferred the $$$ to the seller's account for a US Ref top. vintage-y, but nothing beats this 1940s- inspired Tosphop dress that i've bidded for. its auctions closes tmr. hope to get it. pray for me. i know no other more perfect dress to wear on my birthday to watch animal farm. sigh. with all this mugging, studying and constant depression, my birthday and national day are definitely two days that can't come any sooner.
anway my room rocks. hafiz thinks so too. its so bachelor's pad. we made cheese and egg sandwiches and devoured them in my room. i have this inflatable sofa and... its mega comfy. with the red & yellow beadings dangling by my window and the red & white sofa itself, along with my retro bedside lamps and bedside table... we felt trasported to the 60s. just for campy value, i played my beatles best hits cd. it felt good to just bounce on my bed and sing some good ol' beatles while hafiz choked on his sandwich laughing at me. nice afternoon.
school was mentally exhausting. forex, john donne's perception of love, sea history exam format... whooooa. me, hafiz, bryan and fahrur were planning our bachelor's pad[s] during history lecture. at least bryan and fahrur were. me n hafiz were planning our home. haha. we know we might not last but it just happens to be that we both want 2- room HDB flats for our first home so it seemed harmless to plan it together. it was quite fun. figuring out where the kitchen goes, where the room is, where the fridge is, the washing machine... try it. its kinda fun.
have got TWO econs tests tomorrow. all i can say is, thank god i've finished my gp essay. will mug for econs later tonight. sigh. before & after friends, of course.
will be slacking for now... good luck those taking the test tmr!
just for the heck of it, SCHOOL SUCKS!
p.s. MRISI says hi.
-updates- see my dream dress. =] yahoo auctions- item ID 75817105. its quite a hassle. sorry! but my online album has gone bonkers.
p.p.s. apparently, i have $66.99 in my ordinary a/c, $20.24 in my special a/c and $30.37 in my medisave a/c. all this according to this flimsy green paper i receive from the freakin CPF Board every mth. now if only i could withdraw all that frigging money, i wouldn't be eating bread and water everyday, would i? blithering CPF.
HEAR YE! HEAR YE!
HAIL THE MAJESTIC SUPERWOMAN!
[that's me! ME! MEEEE!]
before you all think i've gone mad, let me explain.
wait, wait! don't go! i DO have an explanation.
well.
i woke up today. groggy and all, and i realized my nose was itching like mad and i thought my room had been bombed.
those were caused by over- the- safe- limits- amount of dust and my messy way of life, respectively.
so i sat upright with a mission. [well not upright but you know... kinda slouched on my headrest and held my head a lil' straight.]
I AM GOING TO CLEAN MY ROOM. ABSOLUTELY CLEAN AND DUST- FREE.
results? of course.
when i'm determined, i'm a psycho.
i moved my bed.
my wadrobe. [mind you, i've got lotsa clothes.]
my TV table.
my study table.
my dressing table.
my sidetable.
now, my room looks like it belongs to someone else.
it's quite disorienting, to be honest.
i forgot where all the furniture used to be even.
heh. weird.
that's the problem with me.
i let all this mess pile- up, feel like i'm gonna die under clothes, before i decide to clean- up.
should start listening to my mum and hafiz. [yes, they tell me the same things. freaky.]
"Clean- up constantly so you don't have to do this massive spring- cleaning thing every 6 months."
but who is fiza if she doesn't move her furniture?
i've got to constantly change the state of my room.
now it looks bachelor pad- ish. niceee.
if it gets messy... well. i'll clean it after a levels.
hopefully i will still be able to see the floor at that point of time.
i think i hurt my right arm and my back pushing my wadrobe.
i was pushing myself against the wall and using my arms and legs to push the wadrobe.
phew. just the recalling itself exhausts me.
on a recap, it all seems funny.
i actually GRUNTED.
oh my god.
i did. good god.
i must have sounded like tarzan. or the williams sisters playing tennis.
crikey. that's a disturbing thought!
oh well. anyway. made up with hafiz. obviously.
i realized i had forgotten the name me and imran gave to this cat i received for my 16th birthday.
so i had to rename it.
made hafiz contribute.
i wanted a name that started with B, M or K.
and i told him to imagine the cat itself, it has really squinty eyes, like, you have to squint too, you know, squint and scrunch up your nose and you'll naturally go mmmmreow or something.
here are some of the names hafiz suggested.
Micasa.
Miku.
Kizu.
Bimmiy.
Kazu. [i feared kazaa but no, he didn't say it.]
Miziyu.
Kewbe.
Kliew.
Mliewi.
Mwawi.
Meee.
Mee Rebus.
as you can see, he is NOT good at this.
i worry for the day that we'll have to name kids.
maybe i shouldn't marry him afterall. *second thoughts*
kidding.
hafiz, if you read this, i repeat, KIDDING. like, hehehe, funny, mischievious funny. ok?
well. finished my gp essay.
"Commercialism and professional players have ruined sport. Discuss."
had a whale of a time thrashing beckham's pricey transfer and singapore's legalisation of betting on soccer games.
yay!
*self- satisfied smile*
it was a load of emotional gibberish though.
but who cares. i'm pooped.
feel like i've been fighting a war against a wadrobe for 24 hours.
sleeping time.
tomorrow people.
oh. in case you were wondering, my cat ended up being named Mrisi. i came up with it. yeah, yeah, its no better than hafiz's but hey... we like it. me and hafiz that is.
but i guess mrisi likes it too. it has a nice ring to it. very call-able.
like, MRISIIIIIIII! HEREEEEEEEEE MRISIIIIIII!
heh.
sleeping time. seriously.
p.s. i forgot. Mrisi is a soft toy. a cuddly cat. she's not a real cat, k. just in case. =]
HAIL THE MAJESTIC SUPERWOMAN!
[that's me! ME! MEEEE!]
before you all think i've gone mad, let me explain.
wait, wait! don't go! i DO have an explanation.
well.
i woke up today. groggy and all, and i realized my nose was itching like mad and i thought my room had been bombed.
those were caused by over- the- safe- limits- amount of dust and my messy way of life, respectively.
so i sat upright with a mission. [well not upright but you know... kinda slouched on my headrest and held my head a lil' straight.]
I AM GOING TO CLEAN MY ROOM. ABSOLUTELY CLEAN AND DUST- FREE.
results? of course.
when i'm determined, i'm a psycho.
i moved my bed.
my wadrobe. [mind you, i've got lotsa clothes.]
my TV table.
my study table.
my dressing table.
my sidetable.
now, my room looks like it belongs to someone else.
it's quite disorienting, to be honest.
i forgot where all the furniture used to be even.
heh. weird.
that's the problem with me.
i let all this mess pile- up, feel like i'm gonna die under clothes, before i decide to clean- up.
should start listening to my mum and hafiz. [yes, they tell me the same things. freaky.]
"Clean- up constantly so you don't have to do this massive spring- cleaning thing every 6 months."
but who is fiza if she doesn't move her furniture?
i've got to constantly change the state of my room.
now it looks bachelor pad- ish. niceee.
if it gets messy... well. i'll clean it after a levels.
hopefully i will still be able to see the floor at that point of time.
i think i hurt my right arm and my back pushing my wadrobe.
i was pushing myself against the wall and using my arms and legs to push the wadrobe.
phew. just the recalling itself exhausts me.
on a recap, it all seems funny.
i actually GRUNTED.
oh my god.
i did. good god.
i must have sounded like tarzan. or the williams sisters playing tennis.
crikey. that's a disturbing thought!
oh well. anyway. made up with hafiz. obviously.
i realized i had forgotten the name me and imran gave to this cat i received for my 16th birthday.
so i had to rename it.
made hafiz contribute.
i wanted a name that started with B, M or K.
and i told him to imagine the cat itself, it has really squinty eyes, like, you have to squint too, you know, squint and scrunch up your nose and you'll naturally go mmmmreow or something.
here are some of the names hafiz suggested.
Micasa.
Miku.
Kizu.
Bimmiy.
Kazu. [i feared kazaa but no, he didn't say it.]
Miziyu.
Kewbe.
Kliew.
Mliewi.
Mwawi.
Meee.
Mee Rebus.
as you can see, he is NOT good at this.
i worry for the day that we'll have to name kids.
maybe i shouldn't marry him afterall. *second thoughts*
kidding.
hafiz, if you read this, i repeat, KIDDING. like, hehehe, funny, mischievious funny. ok?
well. finished my gp essay.
"Commercialism and professional players have ruined sport. Discuss."
had a whale of a time thrashing beckham's pricey transfer and singapore's legalisation of betting on soccer games.
yay!
*self- satisfied smile*
it was a load of emotional gibberish though.
but who cares. i'm pooped.
feel like i've been fighting a war against a wadrobe for 24 hours.
sleeping time.
tomorrow people.
oh. in case you were wondering, my cat ended up being named Mrisi. i came up with it. yeah, yeah, its no better than hafiz's but hey... we like it. me and hafiz that is.
but i guess mrisi likes it too. it has a nice ring to it. very call-able.
like, MRISIIIIIIII! HEREEEEEEEEE MRISIIIIIII!
heh.
sleeping time. seriously.
p.s. i forgot. Mrisi is a soft toy. a cuddly cat. she's not a real cat, k. just in case. =]
Saturday, July 26, 2003
looked like i spoke too soon. i think i'm doing the silent treatment thing. or maybe not. the cold shoulder thing, maybe? whatever. point is, i'm being a cranky little lady over something totally trivial. stinking pms. total hormonal derangement. oh well. i can only hope tomorrow is better. though i know its 70% my fault, i just can't be bothered to do anything anymore today. pms has a way of throwing in a gazillion different emotions in one day and that's damn exhausting. just want to end the day. i'm being an idiot. so sue me. pms is a scientifically- proven estrogen imbalance DISEASE.
chocolate- dipped strawberries, 8 for $5!
had em' today. like every other day when i go esplanade.
that chocolate box shop is sinful. sigh.
but a good sin.
reeeaaally good.
one more. try the opera thingy at delifrance.
the small one, not the big one.
its bite- size, and a dollar each.
melts in your mouth. i swear. its superyummyfingerlickingabsolutelyfunkadelically delicious.
try it. and the gold thing that looks like foil? its edible. totally.
bid on my 1940's dress already. tho i'm still short on cash.
hope to get it. its perfect.
i might be in love. beware.
wrote my donne essay. well a paragraph of it.
blaah. and i still have gp to go.
2 months, fiza, 2 months, and it'll all be over.
literally.
mum gave me a $30 pan pacific cafe/ restaurant voucher.
will attack pan pacific delicatessen section with aggression come national day.
with, of course, my boyfriend of 8 mths and 1 day, as of national day.
bwarhahaha. its been eons, hasn't it?
but it still feels new... very raw and new.
to think we see each other everyday. you'll think we're sick of each other or something.
but no.
yesterday, when he told me we were meeting at 10.30 a.m. today, i requested an earlier time cuz "i missed you [him] already."
[of course, we ended meeting at 10.40 a.m. cuz i was late but that's not the point here.]
we do have fights. and it gets very serious at times.
but we're laid- back people with supportive friends and family.
that helps i guess.
i just hope he's the last. enough of this BGR shindig already aye.
and bryan. i'm sorry. i know what you're saying.
"DAMN PISSED CAN!"
had em' today. like every other day when i go esplanade.
that chocolate box shop is sinful. sigh.
but a good sin.
reeeaaally good.
one more. try the opera thingy at delifrance.
the small one, not the big one.
its bite- size, and a dollar each.
melts in your mouth. i swear. its superyummyfingerlickingabsolutelyfunkadelically delicious.
try it. and the gold thing that looks like foil? its edible. totally.
bid on my 1940's dress already. tho i'm still short on cash.
hope to get it. its perfect.
i might be in love. beware.
wrote my donne essay. well a paragraph of it.
blaah. and i still have gp to go.
2 months, fiza, 2 months, and it'll all be over.
literally.
mum gave me a $30 pan pacific cafe/ restaurant voucher.
will attack pan pacific delicatessen section with aggression come national day.
with, of course, my boyfriend of 8 mths and 1 day, as of national day.
bwarhahaha. its been eons, hasn't it?
but it still feels new... very raw and new.
to think we see each other everyday. you'll think we're sick of each other or something.
but no.
yesterday, when he told me we were meeting at 10.30 a.m. today, i requested an earlier time cuz "i missed you [him] already."
[of course, we ended meeting at 10.40 a.m. cuz i was late but that's not the point here.]
we do have fights. and it gets very serious at times.
but we're laid- back people with supportive friends and family.
that helps i guess.
i just hope he's the last. enough of this BGR shindig already aye.
and bryan. i'm sorry. i know what you're saying.
"DAMN PISSED CAN!"
Friday, July 25, 2003
fireworks and national day
making a something for hafiz.
yay!
feeling good now.
hum de hum hum dee dee hum...
school was okay... barely remember a thing.
oh wait.
there already IS an entry bout' school today.
no wonder.
hahaha.
managed to make hafiz watch spongebob squarepants.
he admitted it was funny.
i have successfully converted him. yessss.
mum made macaroni soup. mmm...
studying with hafiz tomorrow.
which reminds me. i studied gothic and econs in school today for 3 hours or so.
ah. that explains the numbing pain in my brain.
that and john donne's crazy 19 stanzas.
we will be heading to bras basah to sell of stuff to get $$$.
in desperate need of it.
hopefully will get my dress. hafiz saw it.
he said it was nice too. its so vintage-y. totally 1940s.
excuse my mindless blabbering.
watch out for more when i've actually gotten the dress.
haha.
i love my life.
aaah...
making a something for hafiz.
yay!
feeling good now.
hum de hum hum dee dee hum...
school was okay... barely remember a thing.
oh wait.
there already IS an entry bout' school today.
no wonder.
hahaha.
managed to make hafiz watch spongebob squarepants.
he admitted it was funny.
i have successfully converted him. yessss.
mum made macaroni soup. mmm...
studying with hafiz tomorrow.
which reminds me. i studied gothic and econs in school today for 3 hours or so.
ah. that explains the numbing pain in my brain.
that and john donne's crazy 19 stanzas.
we will be heading to bras basah to sell of stuff to get $$$.
in desperate need of it.
hopefully will get my dress. hafiz saw it.
he said it was nice too. its so vintage-y. totally 1940s.
excuse my mindless blabbering.
watch out for more when i've actually gotten the dress.
haha.
i love my life.
aaah...
i hate my runny nose. its the most super stupendously annoying thing that has been bugging me the whole day.
hate john donne's ecstasy. 19 freaking stanzas just to crap about souls communicating and souls returning to their bodies.
god. summarise it will you? have you not heard of connectors? and simple syntax?
hate....
erm... hate.... not having $.
so sad.
saw a beautiful vintage dress.
$30.
saved up $17 bucks.
but i've also bought a $15 top.
so only $2 left.
back to scringing. and budgeting. and fasting.
money. please. fall on my head.
hate john donne's ecstasy. 19 freaking stanzas just to crap about souls communicating and souls returning to their bodies.
god. summarise it will you? have you not heard of connectors? and simple syntax?
hate....
erm... hate.... not having $.
so sad.
saw a beautiful vintage dress.
$30.
saved up $17 bucks.
but i've also bought a $15 top.
so only $2 left.
back to scringing. and budgeting. and fasting.
money. please. fall on my head.
Thursday, July 24, 2003
womenly woes
i HATE mens.
if there's anything i hate at all, its the bloody period.
pun not intended.
what an anti- climatic day compared to yersterday.
bleaah.
today felt extra long. slept away recess and lunch cuz me n hafiz were FASTING.
at least i was until i realized i was freaking bleeding. argh...
hate mens hate mens hate mens.
but the school's sickbay was......... WOO- HOO!!!
damn nice. air- con, comfy bed, silence.... Zzzzzzzz.
went home after that. hafiz bought me thosai to eat.
*smiles*
surfed the net for cheapo auctions.
lovely topshop vintage dress. $30 bucks. if it fits me i'm bidding!!!
surprise sms from ruz. from haqeem's no. so must be her rite.
why would haqeem be apologizing for blowing my trust???
hahaha. she thinks i hate her.
sigh... why does it always come down to hate?
told her i don't hate her, or anyone in the class for that matter.
maybe we all just need the space. which is true i guess.
when things gets too chummy and close friction tends to be more possible.
i prefer it this way... peace and quiet and civility.
i just wish the tension wasn't so obvious.
cuz its not really there... if you know what i mean.
ah well.
still checking out auctions.
sigh.
SHOW ME THE MONEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYY!!!!
i HATE mens.
if there's anything i hate at all, its the bloody period.
pun not intended.
what an anti- climatic day compared to yersterday.
bleaah.
today felt extra long. slept away recess and lunch cuz me n hafiz were FASTING.
at least i was until i realized i was freaking bleeding. argh...
hate mens hate mens hate mens.
but the school's sickbay was......... WOO- HOO!!!
damn nice. air- con, comfy bed, silence.... Zzzzzzzz.
went home after that. hafiz bought me thosai to eat.
*smiles*
surfed the net for cheapo auctions.
lovely topshop vintage dress. $30 bucks. if it fits me i'm bidding!!!
surprise sms from ruz. from haqeem's no. so must be her rite.
why would haqeem be apologizing for blowing my trust???
hahaha. she thinks i hate her.
sigh... why does it always come down to hate?
told her i don't hate her, or anyone in the class for that matter.
maybe we all just need the space. which is true i guess.
when things gets too chummy and close friction tends to be more possible.
i prefer it this way... peace and quiet and civility.
i just wish the tension wasn't so obvious.
cuz its not really there... if you know what i mean.
ah well.
still checking out auctions.
sigh.
SHOW ME THE MONEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYY!!!!
Wednesday, July 23, 2003
23rd. 23 things about today.
Today.
1. Perfect.
2. Great.
3. Wonderful.
4. Faultless.
5. Unspoiled.
Sentosa.
6. Beautiful.
7. Beach.
8. Sun.
9. Sand.
10. Sea.
11. Tan.
12. Breeze.
13. Coconut trees.
14. Calbee Chips.
15. Big Gulp- Coke.
16. Fudgey brownies.
17. Tribal drums.
18. Lots and lots of plucked flowers.
19. Palawan Beach.
20. Southern- most point of Asia.
21. Sunset.
22. Happy tears.
Hafiz.
23. Everything.
Today.
1. Perfect.
2. Great.
3. Wonderful.
4. Faultless.
5. Unspoiled.
Sentosa.
6. Beautiful.
7. Beach.
8. Sun.
9. Sand.
10. Sea.
11. Tan.
12. Breeze.
13. Coconut trees.
14. Calbee Chips.
15. Big Gulp- Coke.
16. Fudgey brownies.
17. Tribal drums.
18. Lots and lots of plucked flowers.
19. Palawan Beach.
20. Southern- most point of Asia.
21. Sunset.
22. Happy tears.
Hafiz.
23. Everything.
Tuesday, July 22, 2003
surprise!
making brownies for hafiz. its a surprise so... shh!
just felt like doing something nice for him for a change.
i've been a darn pain in the ass lately, totally impatient and ignorant of him.
sorry...
today was a... funky day.
man... 2 1/2 hours of econs does madness to my brain!
granted, i now understand forex like the... like the state of my room.
but then, i now know nothing else.
my brain is FULLY saturated. i'm serious.
mrs ong, you're good... too good.
more of this and i'll fall in love with econs. cuz i'll be blind towards other options.
didn't do P.E. whee!
they all had to run... like, REALLY REALLY run.
sorry people. but sometimes you gotta think smart, act fast.
running= avoid at ALL cost.
strike a pain- stricken look, clutch your tummy, claim a pain of gastric.
ta- daa.
and there i was reading TIMES while you were running by the choa chu kang drain.
sorry. didn't mean to rub it in. hehe.
sentosa with peeps are cancelled tmr... cuz 2 aren't going.
and therefore... i dunno.
we're left planless.
marina bay? condo slack again? sentosa just us few?
not sure. but we're still going out i think. nothing's gonna stop us.
especially not studying. muahahaha.
i am surprised to feel myself NOT upset or missing certain people.
maybe because... just because.
maybe it was that way all along.
maybe we're all delusional.
maybe...
maybe i'm finally truly happy.
and so are they.
if so, then what happened doesn't qualify as a bad thing anymore, does it?
eddie koh mentioned how the cliques in the class were so obvious.
then he said the key words.
"But as long as you guys are happy la."
how true. i am.
i guess its selfish cuz i know some people who aren't involved are affected, too.
i'm really really really really really truly deeply sorry.
i swear i never wanted to start it.
i would never want to further segregate the class.
i'm fine being civil to the world. even saddam & bush.
but sometimes, that ain't enough.
when we were seperated into groups, bryan, who was absent, had to be included in the group that had farah a.k.a madonna in it.
haha. sorry bryan. not laughing at you ah.
when i tried to put bryan in a different group, [knowing his preference, or rather, dislike!] there was no way. so he was stuck.
and everyone refused to change groups. so we had to stick with what we had.
what pissed me off, was that ruz said, "alah, not as if bryan is going to do any work anyway!"
bitch. to think bryan is trying to be civil to you. stupid fucking bitch. put me down but leave my friends alone dammit.
shrieking psychopath.
ah. now that that's out of the way, i just received a msg from hafiz.
tmr is probably condo or sth. basically, mainland.
but me and hafiz are off to sentosa this saturday... whee!
he knew i desperately needed some sun, sand and sea...
and he suggested it.
though i know he'ld rather study. thank you.
does it always have to take a loss to appreciate someone?
like my dad.
will i wait till hafiz is 'gone'- somehow, before i truly learn to appreciate him?
i hope not...
*prays fervently*
making brownies for hafiz. its a surprise so... shh!
just felt like doing something nice for him for a change.
i've been a darn pain in the ass lately, totally impatient and ignorant of him.
sorry...
today was a... funky day.
man... 2 1/2 hours of econs does madness to my brain!
granted, i now understand forex like the... like the state of my room.
but then, i now know nothing else.
my brain is FULLY saturated. i'm serious.
mrs ong, you're good... too good.
more of this and i'll fall in love with econs. cuz i'll be blind towards other options.
didn't do P.E. whee!
they all had to run... like, REALLY REALLY run.
sorry people. but sometimes you gotta think smart, act fast.
running= avoid at ALL cost.
strike a pain- stricken look, clutch your tummy, claim a pain of gastric.
ta- daa.
and there i was reading TIMES while you were running by the choa chu kang drain.
sorry. didn't mean to rub it in. hehe.
sentosa with peeps are cancelled tmr... cuz 2 aren't going.
and therefore... i dunno.
we're left planless.
marina bay? condo slack again? sentosa just us few?
not sure. but we're still going out i think. nothing's gonna stop us.
especially not studying. muahahaha.
i am surprised to feel myself NOT upset or missing certain people.
maybe because... just because.
maybe it was that way all along.
maybe we're all delusional.
maybe...
maybe i'm finally truly happy.
and so are they.
if so, then what happened doesn't qualify as a bad thing anymore, does it?
eddie koh mentioned how the cliques in the class were so obvious.
then he said the key words.
"But as long as you guys are happy la."
how true. i am.
i guess its selfish cuz i know some people who aren't involved are affected, too.
i'm really really really really really truly deeply sorry.
i swear i never wanted to start it.
i would never want to further segregate the class.
i'm fine being civil to the world. even saddam & bush.
but sometimes, that ain't enough.
when we were seperated into groups, bryan, who was absent, had to be included in the group that had farah a.k.a madonna in it.
haha. sorry bryan. not laughing at you ah.
when i tried to put bryan in a different group, [knowing his preference, or rather, dislike!] there was no way. so he was stuck.
and everyone refused to change groups. so we had to stick with what we had.
what pissed me off, was that ruz said, "alah, not as if bryan is going to do any work anyway!"
bitch. to think bryan is trying to be civil to you. stupid fucking bitch. put me down but leave my friends alone dammit.
shrieking psychopath.
ah. now that that's out of the way, i just received a msg from hafiz.
tmr is probably condo or sth. basically, mainland.
but me and hafiz are off to sentosa this saturday... whee!
he knew i desperately needed some sun, sand and sea...
and he suggested it.
though i know he'ld rather study. thank you.
does it always have to take a loss to appreciate someone?
like my dad.
will i wait till hafiz is 'gone'- somehow, before i truly learn to appreciate him?
i hope not...
*prays fervently*
Monday, July 21, 2003
ho ho ho!
more bitching... this time round predictably coming from the only one left, imran.
all i can say is, speak on, my ears are shut to your load of bull. why don't you people just get a move on?
moving on.
had a fantabulous day...
school was a drag, of course...
but post- school, went to bukit timah for cheese prata and milo dinosaur!
yummy.
were with true friends, thanks people. you made my day.
took 961 to woodlands. long bus ride.
but.
i had a baaaaad diarhoea. ahakz.
alighted at kranji train station to... ahem...
need i explain?
reached woodlands later on.
supposed to study but ended up "studying" magazines.
vogue, style, entertainment... etc.
haha. so much for studying... momentum... yada yada.
walked home with sheena.
fun.
got home and do econs.
so proud of myself.
haha.
did only 15 questions.
its an improvement wat.
heh.
talking on the phone with hafiz now...
a bit distracted.
more tomorrow people...
more bitching... this time round predictably coming from the only one left, imran.
all i can say is, speak on, my ears are shut to your load of bull. why don't you people just get a move on?
moving on.
had a fantabulous day...
school was a drag, of course...
but post- school, went to bukit timah for cheese prata and milo dinosaur!
yummy.
were with true friends, thanks people. you made my day.
took 961 to woodlands. long bus ride.
but.
i had a baaaaad diarhoea. ahakz.
alighted at kranji train station to... ahem...
need i explain?
reached woodlands later on.
supposed to study but ended up "studying" magazines.
vogue, style, entertainment... etc.
haha. so much for studying... momentum... yada yada.
walked home with sheena.
fun.
got home and do econs.
so proud of myself.
haha.
did only 15 questions.
its an improvement wat.
heh.
talking on the phone with hafiz now...
a bit distracted.
more tomorrow people...
Sunday, July 20, 2003
sundays.
nothing much happened...
read, ate, slacked...
an absolute couch potato today.
i am definitely becoming fat.
hahaha. that can only be good, eh?
sundays are gilmore girls day.
love that show.
reading this book... about islam and the crisis a modern muslim encounters.
pretty interesting read.
am guilty of many many wrongdoings.
feel inspired to change. to be a better person. to be stronger in my faith.
also feeling inspired to study.
will start tomorow.
promise.
can't wait to hit sentosa.
and jubilee hall for animal farm... yummy yummy yummy...
and my cake. my chocolatey round roundy cake.
my candle. the sunset.
mmmm.... somehow even studying seems to be something i can look forward to.
especially since that it most probably would result in better grades for me.
so... yah... life is looking up.
maybe all that has happened was a blessing in disguise.
and maybe god is still on my side.
nothing much happened...
read, ate, slacked...
an absolute couch potato today.
i am definitely becoming fat.
hahaha. that can only be good, eh?
sundays are gilmore girls day.
love that show.
reading this book... about islam and the crisis a modern muslim encounters.
pretty interesting read.
am guilty of many many wrongdoings.
feel inspired to change. to be a better person. to be stronger in my faith.
also feeling inspired to study.
will start tomorow.
promise.
can't wait to hit sentosa.
and jubilee hall for animal farm... yummy yummy yummy...
and my cake. my chocolatey round roundy cake.
my candle. the sunset.
mmmm.... somehow even studying seems to be something i can look forward to.
especially since that it most probably would result in better grades for me.
so... yah... life is looking up.
maybe all that has happened was a blessing in disguise.
and maybe god is still on my side.
burp.
yummy... had my milo dinosaur & fried mee- hoon... thai style, no less.
heh. very full now. feeling sleepy too.
got it free! cuz i couldn't finish the food, so i had it packed.
i guess the guy forgot to count the packet and just counted what was on a plate.
hehe.
yummy. food is nicer when free, isn't it?
anyway... met my best friend, farhana, at marina bay.
walked around... managed to catch the fireworks... NDP rehearsal?
whatever it was, it was beautiful...
me n farhana have this weird habit of tearing up at the sight of fireworks.
haha.
but we didn't this time. maybe we've grown out of it.
or maybe we had bigger... more cry-able issues.
we soon realized there was only steamboat food there...
so took a bus back to marina station, dropped at orchard, and transferred to bus no. 77 and headed to bukit timah...
so yeah.
its been a loooooong day. haha.
but the fireworks, free food, and chat we had was worth it.
afternoon had hafiz n me slacking at home, healing some wounds i had.
he really can make me smile again.
i'm glad i've lost whatever 'friends' i've "lost".
cuz it'll make me appreciate what i have more...
took a walk... calming.
so all in all, a good day.
made up for some harsh pains i felt yesterday.
thank god for friends.
and fireworks.
yummy... had my milo dinosaur & fried mee- hoon... thai style, no less.
heh. very full now. feeling sleepy too.
got it free! cuz i couldn't finish the food, so i had it packed.
i guess the guy forgot to count the packet and just counted what was on a plate.
hehe.
yummy. food is nicer when free, isn't it?
anyway... met my best friend, farhana, at marina bay.
walked around... managed to catch the fireworks... NDP rehearsal?
whatever it was, it was beautiful...
me n farhana have this weird habit of tearing up at the sight of fireworks.
haha.
but we didn't this time. maybe we've grown out of it.
or maybe we had bigger... more cry-able issues.
we soon realized there was only steamboat food there...
so took a bus back to marina station, dropped at orchard, and transferred to bus no. 77 and headed to bukit timah...
so yeah.
its been a loooooong day. haha.
but the fireworks, free food, and chat we had was worth it.
afternoon had hafiz n me slacking at home, healing some wounds i had.
he really can make me smile again.
i'm glad i've lost whatever 'friends' i've "lost".
cuz it'll make me appreciate what i have more...
took a walk... calming.
so all in all, a good day.
made up for some harsh pains i felt yesterday.
thank god for friends.
and fireworks.
Friday, July 18, 2003
arts nite was........... bleaah.
it was too.... heavy?
granted, force vomit was worth my $2.
the rest... left much to be desired.
sound and lights were poor... nothing went well, pretty much.
but it was a proper date thing for me and hafiz so...
it was sweet.
despite certain things that upset me, he managed to assure me.
and bryan lost his wallet. hope he'll get it back soon.
so arts nite was pretty much... hell. thanks to a heavy metal band thingy.
headache- inducing.
but the end was nice so.... all's good.
nice night.
aah. lovely. nights world.
it was too.... heavy?
granted, force vomit was worth my $2.
the rest... left much to be desired.
sound and lights were poor... nothing went well, pretty much.
but it was a proper date thing for me and hafiz so...
it was sweet.
despite certain things that upset me, he managed to assure me.
and bryan lost his wallet. hope he'll get it back soon.
so arts nite was pretty much... hell. thanks to a heavy metal band thingy.
headache- inducing.
but the end was nice so.... all's good.
nice night.
aah. lovely. nights world.
for those who are wondering what just happened in the previous entry, ignore it.
kinda insignificant.
heh.
here's something funny i read before...
rules that girls wish guys knew
When you have a headache or are sick, either take something for it or go to the doctor.
When you are sick, the world does not revolve around you.
Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big boy. Show some consideration and put it down where you found it.
Also, when you have to go, go IN the bowl, not around it.
If you must scratch or adjust, please wait until you can go into a bathroom. It can't be so urgent that you have to make the whole world watch.
Sometimes there are better things to do besides watch sports on TV. Really.
If your team loses, life will go on.
Just because you only see 16 colors doesn't mean we have to limit ourselves. Mauve is a great color.
Try to expand your cultural horizons once in a while. It might be painful at first, but watching a show, or a foreign film, or eating a different kind of food will
NOT kill you. We promise.
Don't get mad if we cut our hair. We own our hair, you don't.
We love shoes. Get over it.
When we ask you for help in picking out what to wear, it is because we want to look nice for you. Certainly you have an opinion. (You have opinions on
plenty of other things.) Why won't you say what it is?
There is no point in yelling at the stupid commentators on TV. They can't hear you and wouldn't care anyway.
Learn to use a calendar. It is quite simple. The numbers never go beyond 31. And the nice, big boxes are for writing reminders in. You do know how to count and write, don't you?
Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not opportunities for you to buy that power tool you always wanted and to try to give it to us as a present. Use some imagination to pick a gift, or ask one of our sisters or girlfriends for help.
If you must ogle other women, at least do so without hanging your tongue out, too.
We like to know what you are thinking, because we care about you and are interested in you. Admittedly, sometimes we forget that you aren't thinking
about anything. But we do want to catch that one thought you have every week or so; consequently, we'll ask. Particularly if you look like you are thinking. (Note to self: the absent look on his face means he's *not* thinking.)
If you say something mean, don't expect us to just smile and forget it.
If something is wrong, and you don't say what it is, don't expect the problem to go away by itself. Holding it inside, then exploding is not the answer.
Sometimes we get upset and cry. We do that.
There is nothing unmanly about having emotions and sharing them. It is actually healthy and helps build a relationship. Don't be afraid to tell us how you feel.
Relationships develop between two people who get to know each other by talking and doing things together. Sharing thoughts and experiences. Not just by being physically on the same planet.
We like to build the emotional side of the relationship before sex. We don't use sex as a way of getting emotionally close. We know this is a stretch for you, but you can learn to accept it.
Some questions require more than one word answers. You do know more words than "Yes", "No", "OK", and "Uh". We can lend you a thesaurus if that will help.
Learn to watch TV without the remote in your hand. Think of it as mental-toughness training.
If we want to talk to you, why do we have to wait for a commercial break? Pretend-people and made-up situations shouldn't take the place of real life.
Understand that the models in magazines are something like 25% thinner than the average woman. We try not to be influenced by the constant bombardment of these images but it is hard. Be understanding if we feel insecure about how we look.
So -- don't ask us to dress in Victoria's Secret attire unless we have perfect bodies. Just don't.
We don't like porn and don't want you to like it either. Sorry. Life is tough.
We are not your mother.
Don't make us remind you to clean up after yourself. (See rule immediately above.)
Maturity is sometimes required of adults. Life really is tough, isn't it?
kinda insignificant.
heh.
here's something funny i read before...
rules that girls wish guys knew
When you have a headache or are sick, either take something for it or go to the doctor.
When you are sick, the world does not revolve around you.
Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big boy. Show some consideration and put it down where you found it.
Also, when you have to go, go IN the bowl, not around it.
If you must scratch or adjust, please wait until you can go into a bathroom. It can't be so urgent that you have to make the whole world watch.
Sometimes there are better things to do besides watch sports on TV. Really.
If your team loses, life will go on.
Just because you only see 16 colors doesn't mean we have to limit ourselves. Mauve is a great color.
Try to expand your cultural horizons once in a while. It might be painful at first, but watching a show, or a foreign film, or eating a different kind of food will
NOT kill you. We promise.
Don't get mad if we cut our hair. We own our hair, you don't.
We love shoes. Get over it.
When we ask you for help in picking out what to wear, it is because we want to look nice for you. Certainly you have an opinion. (You have opinions on
plenty of other things.) Why won't you say what it is?
There is no point in yelling at the stupid commentators on TV. They can't hear you and wouldn't care anyway.
Learn to use a calendar. It is quite simple. The numbers never go beyond 31. And the nice, big boxes are for writing reminders in. You do know how to count and write, don't you?
Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not opportunities for you to buy that power tool you always wanted and to try to give it to us as a present. Use some imagination to pick a gift, or ask one of our sisters or girlfriends for help.
If you must ogle other women, at least do so without hanging your tongue out, too.
We like to know what you are thinking, because we care about you and are interested in you. Admittedly, sometimes we forget that you aren't thinking
about anything. But we do want to catch that one thought you have every week or so; consequently, we'll ask. Particularly if you look like you are thinking. (Note to self: the absent look on his face means he's *not* thinking.)
If you say something mean, don't expect us to just smile and forget it.
If something is wrong, and you don't say what it is, don't expect the problem to go away by itself. Holding it inside, then exploding is not the answer.
Sometimes we get upset and cry. We do that.
There is nothing unmanly about having emotions and sharing them. It is actually healthy and helps build a relationship. Don't be afraid to tell us how you feel.
Relationships develop between two people who get to know each other by talking and doing things together. Sharing thoughts and experiences. Not just by being physically on the same planet.
We like to build the emotional side of the relationship before sex. We don't use sex as a way of getting emotionally close. We know this is a stretch for you, but you can learn to accept it.
Some questions require more than one word answers. You do know more words than "Yes", "No", "OK", and "Uh". We can lend you a thesaurus if that will help.
Learn to watch TV without the remote in your hand. Think of it as mental-toughness training.
If we want to talk to you, why do we have to wait for a commercial break? Pretend-people and made-up situations shouldn't take the place of real life.
Understand that the models in magazines are something like 25% thinner than the average woman. We try not to be influenced by the constant bombardment of these images but it is hard. Be understanding if we feel insecure about how we look.
So -- don't ask us to dress in Victoria's Secret attire unless we have perfect bodies. Just don't.
We don't like porn and don't want you to like it either. Sorry. Life is tough.
We are not your mother.
Don't make us remind you to clean up after yourself. (See rule immediately above.)
Maturity is sometimes required of adults. Life really is tough, isn't it?
Thursday, July 17, 2003
comin' up soon...
Sum 41 gig @ Fort Canning! 30th July, 8 pm cheapest tix: $60 for students
Sylvia- What if your dog could talk? @ AGF Theatre, Alliance Francaise :: Opening 8th August :: cheapest tix: $23 for students
The Dim Sum Dollies in Steaming! -An all- new cabaret revue- @ Jubilee Hall, Raffles Hotel Singapore :: Opening 15th July :: cheapest tix: $22 previews only
*** Mardi Gras *** R[A]- 18 *** @ Jubilee Hall :: Opening 13th August :: tix: $71, $51 $31 with 20% off for students [wanna watch this but i'm a september baby. damn.]
When I Was Little @ DBS Arts Centre- Home of SRT :: Opening 3rd August :: cheapest tix: $45 tho u can buy the $100 VIP donation tix. note: this one is for charity
Dances of The World @ Esplanade Concert Hall :: Opening 1st August :: cheapest tix: $10, $14, $20
Animal Farm @ Jubilee Hall :: Opening 3rd September [ahemm...] :: cheapest tix: $28
that's all for tonight. time to indulge... "Bachelorette- Men Tell All."
nights.
Sum 41 gig @ Fort Canning! 30th July, 8 pm cheapest tix: $60 for students
Sylvia- What if your dog could talk? @ AGF Theatre, Alliance Francaise :: Opening 8th August :: cheapest tix: $23 for students
The Dim Sum Dollies in Steaming! -An all- new cabaret revue- @ Jubilee Hall, Raffles Hotel Singapore :: Opening 15th July :: cheapest tix: $22 previews only
*** Mardi Gras *** R[A]- 18 *** @ Jubilee Hall :: Opening 13th August :: tix: $71, $51 $31 with 20% off for students [wanna watch this but i'm a september baby. damn.]
When I Was Little @ DBS Arts Centre- Home of SRT :: Opening 3rd August :: cheapest tix: $45 tho u can buy the $100 VIP donation tix. note: this one is for charity
Dances of The World @ Esplanade Concert Hall :: Opening 1st August :: cheapest tix: $10, $14, $20
Animal Farm @ Jubilee Hall :: Opening 3rd September [ahemm...] :: cheapest tix: $28
that's all for tonight. time to indulge... "Bachelorette- Men Tell All."
nights.
of aggressions & pigs...
early in the morning, school started with a big bang.
no, more like fireworks between me n hafiz.
not the good kind, the tense, violent kind.
i don't know why but somehow i felt soooo pissed just looking at his face, i just wanted to get on the court and thrash him.
really really thrash him.
there were several face- offs when i was trying to block his shot- those moments, it took all my strength to not punch him.
i was really that angry.
he did something. pushed his luck.
i guess that doesn't justify the way i treated him during captain's ball but hey... you pushed it. bad luck.
on top of that, i'm going through mild depression with the release of results. - check previous entry -
and for someone who always does well, i doubt he understands what its like to have to try soooo bloody hard to get where you are and where you are is not even good enough.
recess was spent with me and him in seperate venues. but i didn't want him to think i hated him.
so i bought him something. school held this small stall with special people selling handmade handicrafts.
it was heartwarming to see this guy so focussed on his efforts to place dried flowers just so on the bookmark.
so i bought this, erm... test- tube- ish thingy with magic stars in em' n glass painting on the outside. it was nice.
slid it into his bag before lecture.
i was right beside him when i did it and he didn't even notice me. i need to gain weight!
he liked it. but by then, i felt like it was too awkward to immediately start talking and chatting away.
but we finally did. of course.
went to town after school with bryan, sheena, fahrur, hafiz n me. were joined later by wahidah, fahrur's friend.
ate KFC at lido. free re- fill!!! haha.
walked around town. headed to wisma's topman- niceeee... but the shirt hafiz wanted was no longer there... *sobs*
headed back to far east after doing a full round in wisma atria.
at far east, bryan got his "squealer." sweet boy, that one.
sheena got her skirt. shopahalic on the loose alert. ahakz.
we walked past Han's Cafe and i was gushing over the peach tarts... and fahrur dragged me away. humph. evil.
but.
*beams*
but.
hafiz bought me two peach tarts when my back was turned. *recalls happily*
it was so sweet of him, since it was his last two dollars left. and he spent it all on me.
thank you sooo much. not just for the tarts, but for everything.
went home with sheena n hafiz. kinda fun.
oh, ruzainah was going thru a bad time n i was soothing her, sorta.
she msged me just now. "thanks for being there just now. i really appreciated it. and about the class thing, i try to be neutral but it's kinda hard."
i'm glad she is not in denial. face it, i'm no longer with the same company i used to be in.
and i am happy where i am. as you probably can tell.
maybe i changed. maybe its the other way round. bu friendship, no matter the distance, is still friendship. if it was sincere in the first place.
so i told ruz.
"nah its ok... its not like friendship is like a marital commitment."
maybe it is a marital commitment [ to certain people] and my perception had ruined my chances of becoming friends with certain people.
somehow, i find myself not really caring.
i do have friends i choose to commit to.
maybe i've changed. or at least my priorities has.
going through lots of mood swings due to results. discouraged and angry at myself.
maybe that's why other issues fade in importance.
and i feel that somehow, sheen, dan, fahrur, bryan n hafiz will be there if i need them.
and that's more than i can ever ask for.
.
..
...
....
.....
....
...
..
.
*smiles*
early in the morning, school started with a big bang.
no, more like fireworks between me n hafiz.
not the good kind, the tense, violent kind.
i don't know why but somehow i felt soooo pissed just looking at his face, i just wanted to get on the court and thrash him.
really really thrash him.
there were several face- offs when i was trying to block his shot- those moments, it took all my strength to not punch him.
i was really that angry.
he did something. pushed his luck.
i guess that doesn't justify the way i treated him during captain's ball but hey... you pushed it. bad luck.
on top of that, i'm going through mild depression with the release of results. - check previous entry -
and for someone who always does well, i doubt he understands what its like to have to try soooo bloody hard to get where you are and where you are is not even good enough.
recess was spent with me and him in seperate venues. but i didn't want him to think i hated him.
so i bought him something. school held this small stall with special people selling handmade handicrafts.
it was heartwarming to see this guy so focussed on his efforts to place dried flowers just so on the bookmark.
so i bought this, erm... test- tube- ish thingy with magic stars in em' n glass painting on the outside. it was nice.
slid it into his bag before lecture.
i was right beside him when i did it and he didn't even notice me. i need to gain weight!
he liked it. but by then, i felt like it was too awkward to immediately start talking and chatting away.
but we finally did. of course.
went to town after school with bryan, sheena, fahrur, hafiz n me. were joined later by wahidah, fahrur's friend.
ate KFC at lido. free re- fill!!! haha.
walked around town. headed to wisma's topman- niceeee... but the shirt hafiz wanted was no longer there... *sobs*
headed back to far east after doing a full round in wisma atria.
at far east, bryan got his "squealer." sweet boy, that one.
sheena got her skirt. shopahalic on the loose alert. ahakz.
we walked past Han's Cafe and i was gushing over the peach tarts... and fahrur dragged me away. humph. evil.
but.
*beams*
but.
hafiz bought me two peach tarts when my back was turned. *recalls happily*
it was so sweet of him, since it was his last two dollars left. and he spent it all on me.
thank you sooo much. not just for the tarts, but for everything.
went home with sheena n hafiz. kinda fun.
oh, ruzainah was going thru a bad time n i was soothing her, sorta.
she msged me just now. "thanks for being there just now. i really appreciated it. and about the class thing, i try to be neutral but it's kinda hard."
i'm glad she is not in denial. face it, i'm no longer with the same company i used to be in.
and i am happy where i am. as you probably can tell.
maybe i changed. maybe its the other way round. bu friendship, no matter the distance, is still friendship. if it was sincere in the first place.
so i told ruz.
"nah its ok... its not like friendship is like a marital commitment."
maybe it is a marital commitment [ to certain people] and my perception had ruined my chances of becoming friends with certain people.
somehow, i find myself not really caring.
i do have friends i choose to commit to.
maybe i've changed. or at least my priorities has.
going through lots of mood swings due to results. discouraged and angry at myself.
maybe that's why other issues fade in importance.
and i feel that somehow, sheen, dan, fahrur, bryan n hafiz will be there if i need them.
and that's more than i can ever ask for.
.
..
...
....
.....
....
...
..
.
*smiles*
Tuesday, July 15, 2003
fail fail fail.
i am officially a failure. can't even get an AO grade for econs.
what grades will i get in the A's? don't answer me.
dammit. i hate hate hate hate failure.
its so... discouraging. frustrating. disappointing.
i've never felt more disappointed in myself.
feeling very very very stupid now.
failed all econs paper except for the DRQ & Case Study.
which was due to pure luck anyway.
dammit. where the hell are my brain cells.
feeling sooooooooooo frustrated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
to top it off, i am probably failing literature too, at the rate i'm going.
how am i going to explain my B for the common test and the F this time round?
its pure and simple, mum. i've gone stupid.
S.T.U.P.I.D.
BLEARGH.
i wish i could add in my typical, "but, on a brighter note entirely..." but i can't.
there's no bright note for today.
gloomy, rainy tuesday.
if i had played in the rain when it was heavy, i might have been cured.
but the striking lightnings scared me.
and the school looks like its about to flood.
stupid school, with stupid me in it.
why? why is my life such a shit at the moment? is this really how its meant to be?
i feel so regretful- about whatever i've done in the past to deserve this.
this morning, gp lesson was about PHILOSOPHY.
sigh. "intrinsic values, intangible pleasures" etc.
bullshit. at the end of the day, weren't we studying all that to do well in GP?
my answers to three questions posted today...
"Define LIFE in one word."
- surprising - it is. especially for me. i was DEFINITELY surprised to pass exams without studying, wake up the next day still breathing, and definitely definitely surprised by my father's death. you don't know anything about life. nothing's relative or tangible. for all i care i'll die tonight, and this is my last entry.
"What is your most satisfying accomplishment?"
- when i have one i'll tell. - sadly, i wasn't trying to be funny or cynical. i was being honest. what have i accomplished? satisfying is definitely a condition several incidents in my life DO NO satisfy. everything is so mechanical. its hard to even REALIZE if you've accomplished, or worse, FEEL satisfied.
"What makes life meaningful to you?"
- no regrets - honest. i believe that everything happens for a reason, hence i should never regret. when i am able to look back and not feel remorse, i feel like life is worth living- thus meaningful.
i liked doris's answer- to defining life in a word- DEATH. true. morbid. but true.
sheena's- YES
hafiz's- VOYAGE
nazreen's- HARD
inspiring and also realistic opinions.
as of now, i'm not much cheered. but God Bless Blogspots.
p.s kak zarinah, here's the addie to check the pics... http://www.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=7725416/t_=6577025
has me & u, the family [some] & my guy. tell me wat u tink of him. ahakz.
i am officially a failure. can't even get an AO grade for econs.
what grades will i get in the A's? don't answer me.
dammit. i hate hate hate hate failure.
its so... discouraging. frustrating. disappointing.
i've never felt more disappointed in myself.
feeling very very very stupid now.
failed all econs paper except for the DRQ & Case Study.
which was due to pure luck anyway.
dammit. where the hell are my brain cells.
feeling sooooooooooo frustrated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
to top it off, i am probably failing literature too, at the rate i'm going.
how am i going to explain my B for the common test and the F this time round?
its pure and simple, mum. i've gone stupid.
S.T.U.P.I.D.
BLEARGH.
i wish i could add in my typical, "but, on a brighter note entirely..." but i can't.
there's no bright note for today.
gloomy, rainy tuesday.
if i had played in the rain when it was heavy, i might have been cured.
but the striking lightnings scared me.
and the school looks like its about to flood.
stupid school, with stupid me in it.
why? why is my life such a shit at the moment? is this really how its meant to be?
i feel so regretful- about whatever i've done in the past to deserve this.
this morning, gp lesson was about PHILOSOPHY.
sigh. "intrinsic values, intangible pleasures" etc.
bullshit. at the end of the day, weren't we studying all that to do well in GP?
my answers to three questions posted today...
"Define LIFE in one word."
- surprising - it is. especially for me. i was DEFINITELY surprised to pass exams without studying, wake up the next day still breathing, and definitely definitely surprised by my father's death. you don't know anything about life. nothing's relative or tangible. for all i care i'll die tonight, and this is my last entry.
"What is your most satisfying accomplishment?"
- when i have one i'll tell. - sadly, i wasn't trying to be funny or cynical. i was being honest. what have i accomplished? satisfying is definitely a condition several incidents in my life DO NO satisfy. everything is so mechanical. its hard to even REALIZE if you've accomplished, or worse, FEEL satisfied.
"What makes life meaningful to you?"
- no regrets - honest. i believe that everything happens for a reason, hence i should never regret. when i am able to look back and not feel remorse, i feel like life is worth living- thus meaningful.
i liked doris's answer- to defining life in a word- DEATH. true. morbid. but true.
sheena's- YES
hafiz's- VOYAGE
nazreen's- HARD
inspiring and also realistic opinions.
as of now, i'm not much cheered. but God Bless Blogspots.
p.s kak zarinah, here's the addie to check the pics... http://www.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=7725416/t_=6577025
has me & u, the family [some] & my guy. tell me wat u tink of him. ahakz.
Monday, July 14, 2003
isn't it ironic?
wasn't planning on writing bout' this but read my previous entry and couldn't help feeling a tinge of irony.
only yesterday i mentioned his name, and today he was out to ruin my plans.
i'm permanently jinxed. does he have to be in my life forever, a permanent fixture, kinda like a wart on your ass you'll rather not touch?
yeah, that's my ex for you.
true, we've moved on and were back to good friends once. but we now move in different circles and i have to admit, i feel freer without his obnoxious presence.
he is not below me, neither am i above. but i just had enough of him.
this is not meant to offend anyone, not even him. i understand those who wants him there and actually likes him. please. i loved this guy. i know his ways and charms.
but. saturday was supposed to be my perfect day. beautiful sun n lovely company. i wouldn't have minded anyone- anyone at all, except for my dearest ex and three hypocritical souls in class.
so hate me for being self- centred. its my life and all i ask for is an ex- less saturday. lovely company only- saturday. is dat so much to ask?
it pisses me off, it really does. i thought breaking up would rid me of him. but no. i guess migration is the only other choice.
i'm sorry imran, i never wanted to hate you, you were an extremely dear friend, but your fakeness, your fake accent, your pretentious life, your ego- centric way of ruining people's friendships is just unacceptable on my perfect saturday.
another day perhaps.
its supposed to be a non- clique day. so much for that.
damn it, imran. why do you have to make me hate you? why do you have to be so ubiquitious? why are you ALWAYS ALWAYS fucking there?
fuck you imran. fuck you and just go away. maybe not anywhere far but at least out of my saturdays, ok.
on a brighter note entirely. this was supposed to be my focus for today's entry.
- flunked econs. how predictable.
- ate pizza at bryan's condo with sheena & hafiz & bryan. yummy.
- played tennis afterwards. i suck.
- swam. woo-hoo!!! bryan, your jacuzzi rocks.
had to downsize it to point- form cuz the whole thing was just so perfect and wonderful and nice.
normal. happy. funny. friends.
don't have to say much... but just know this, today goes down as one of the best days of my life. honest.
simplicity. nice.
despite the setback in school... but oh well.
i guess it's payback for my own little screwed- up mistake of stupidly following him to this wretched school.
but then again, i wouldn't have met the lovely people i've come to know here... so...
oh well. let's just hope me & imran somehow regain our friendliness this saturday.
considering the miracles that has occured yet far, you just might never know... *crosses fingers hopefully*
wasn't planning on writing bout' this but read my previous entry and couldn't help feeling a tinge of irony.
only yesterday i mentioned his name, and today he was out to ruin my plans.
i'm permanently jinxed. does he have to be in my life forever, a permanent fixture, kinda like a wart on your ass you'll rather not touch?
yeah, that's my ex for you.
true, we've moved on and were back to good friends once. but we now move in different circles and i have to admit, i feel freer without his obnoxious presence.
he is not below me, neither am i above. but i just had enough of him.
this is not meant to offend anyone, not even him. i understand those who wants him there and actually likes him. please. i loved this guy. i know his ways and charms.
but. saturday was supposed to be my perfect day. beautiful sun n lovely company. i wouldn't have minded anyone- anyone at all, except for my dearest ex and three hypocritical souls in class.
so hate me for being self- centred. its my life and all i ask for is an ex- less saturday. lovely company only- saturday. is dat so much to ask?
it pisses me off, it really does. i thought breaking up would rid me of him. but no. i guess migration is the only other choice.
i'm sorry imran, i never wanted to hate you, you were an extremely dear friend, but your fakeness, your fake accent, your pretentious life, your ego- centric way of ruining people's friendships is just unacceptable on my perfect saturday.
another day perhaps.
its supposed to be a non- clique day. so much for that.
damn it, imran. why do you have to make me hate you? why do you have to be so ubiquitious? why are you ALWAYS ALWAYS fucking there?
fuck you imran. fuck you and just go away. maybe not anywhere far but at least out of my saturdays, ok.
on a brighter note entirely. this was supposed to be my focus for today's entry.
- flunked econs. how predictable.
- ate pizza at bryan's condo with sheena & hafiz & bryan. yummy.
- played tennis afterwards. i suck.
- swam. woo-hoo!!! bryan, your jacuzzi rocks.
had to downsize it to point- form cuz the whole thing was just so perfect and wonderful and nice.
normal. happy. funny. friends.
don't have to say much... but just know this, today goes down as one of the best days of my life. honest.
simplicity. nice.
despite the setback in school... but oh well.
i guess it's payback for my own little screwed- up mistake of stupidly following him to this wretched school.
but then again, i wouldn't have met the lovely people i've come to know here... so...
oh well. let's just hope me & imran somehow regain our friendliness this saturday.
considering the miracles that has occured yet far, you just might never know... *crosses fingers hopefully*
Sunday, July 13, 2003
ho- humm...
managed to clear LLOOTTSSS of rubbish today.
turned out, i only needed a waist- high 3- drawer unit to store all my educative materials.
and a box bigger than my TV to stuff all the other mementos, poems, gifts & whatnots.
i am officially a modernised karang- guni.
pamphlets, postcards, advertisments, bus tickets, movie tix, torn & tattered papers, Pizza Hut bills... the list goes on.
clearing took longer than i thought cuz there was a memory or emotion attached to everything.
even papers with scribbles and hearts, signifies SO much about my school- life. *rolls eyes*
i'm such a sentimental dickhead.
then again, it was nostalgic. looking back, losing imran changed my life alot. he seemed to mean the world to me previously. my only regret was losing him, my sad experiences included saying yes to him then losing him, and one of my happiest experiences was saying yes to him & the outings with him. HIM, HIM, HIM. bleaah.
unfortunately, despite my unexpected achievement of clearing all the rubbish, i have yet to clear the clothes, sweep the floor & move my furniture. i need to create a conducive [clean] environment that will help aid my progress in my learning over the next 4 precious months. sigh. more work ahead. i worry for my back each time i move my wadrobe. the thing is humongous. not to say FULL of clothes.
met him in the evening for a [very] short while. just a little escapade from cleaning- up. ate some McDonald's. hmm.
got home, watched gilmore girls. dean was in it today! yay! but he's now attached to this BLONDE girl. ah, well.
weekend has been nice so far. a decent one. will have to start studying soon i know, everyone else already is. but i need a break, i believe. please tell me i'm right? anyway, i need to finish up my room before anything else... sooo... till then. but i SWEAR i'll start studying soon... please God, make me study soon.
a lil' something i found while clearing up... obviously written for imran... i guess no one can ever love him as much as i did...
a pile of gray rubble surrounding your feet
pick one out and flung it away
floundering in the dark
swimming in the pain
how i wished that times haven't change.
managed to clear LLOOTTSSS of rubbish today.
turned out, i only needed a waist- high 3- drawer unit to store all my educative materials.
and a box bigger than my TV to stuff all the other mementos, poems, gifts & whatnots.
i am officially a modernised karang- guni.
pamphlets, postcards, advertisments, bus tickets, movie tix, torn & tattered papers, Pizza Hut bills... the list goes on.
clearing took longer than i thought cuz there was a memory or emotion attached to everything.
even papers with scribbles and hearts, signifies SO much about my school- life. *rolls eyes*
i'm such a sentimental dickhead.
then again, it was nostalgic. looking back, losing imran changed my life alot. he seemed to mean the world to me previously. my only regret was losing him, my sad experiences included saying yes to him then losing him, and one of my happiest experiences was saying yes to him & the outings with him. HIM, HIM, HIM. bleaah.
unfortunately, despite my unexpected achievement of clearing all the rubbish, i have yet to clear the clothes, sweep the floor & move my furniture. i need to create a conducive [clean] environment that will help aid my progress in my learning over the next 4 precious months. sigh. more work ahead. i worry for my back each time i move my wadrobe. the thing is humongous. not to say FULL of clothes.
met him in the evening for a [very] short while. just a little escapade from cleaning- up. ate some McDonald's. hmm.
got home, watched gilmore girls. dean was in it today! yay! but he's now attached to this BLONDE girl. ah, well.
weekend has been nice so far. a decent one. will have to start studying soon i know, everyone else already is. but i need a break, i believe. please tell me i'm right? anyway, i need to finish up my room before anything else... sooo... till then. but i SWEAR i'll start studying soon... please God, make me study soon.
a lil' something i found while clearing up... obviously written for imran... i guess no one can ever love him as much as i did...
a pile of gray rubble surrounding your feet
pick one out and flung it away
floundering in the dark
swimming in the pain
how i wished that times haven't change.
Saturday, July 12, 2003
visit this...
http://www.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=7691091/t_=6577025
to see my childhood dreams... =]
http://www.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=7691091/t_=6577025
to see my childhood dreams... =]
found snow globes.
sigh.
sigh.
12th of July, Macaroni Day.
damn. i did NOT get hafiz to clean my room.
my mum cooked spicy fried macaroni and we ended up pigging.
along with two chicken paus and a packet of Lay's potato chips.
yummy...
indulged in my all- time guilt pleasure: hindi movie. hahaha... its so EMO...
cried buckets. hey, its really sad ok. hafiz said so too.
and we didn't even finish watching it.
1, it was too sad, 2, hafiz was late for home. hehe.
oh. recap.
met hafiz at chua chu kang control station at about 1.45 noons.
walked there with my "singapore girl" umbrella. wind was so strong, nearly blew me away. really.
felt like mary poppins. a FORCED mary poppins.
we went to NTUC to buy vege, prawns & macaroni.
walking home, hafiz suggested what was already on my mind.
"let's play in the rain."
this, despite the fact we were ALREADY under my brolly AND he had another brolly in his bag.
it was hilarious. haha.
post exam- stress therapy.
got home, mum made us peel the prawns.
spent 5 minutes arguing on how it should be done.
haha. mum chided us saying we needed to eat SOON.
i said, "see hafiz la! wash prawns like washing his own child."
haha. silly boy. he would have washed it individually [all 300 gms of it] if i hadn't stop him.
after that, we were scrubbing our hands like mad cuz it STINKED TERRIBLY.
macaroni rocks.
me and hafiz plan to do some cream & cheese macaroni after school some day.
oops. sorry doris. more cheese... hee. can't help it! i love cheese...
lovely saturday. now. i've gotta start cleaning. something. somewhere...
damn. i did NOT get hafiz to clean my room.
my mum cooked spicy fried macaroni and we ended up pigging.
along with two chicken paus and a packet of Lay's potato chips.
yummy...
indulged in my all- time guilt pleasure: hindi movie. hahaha... its so EMO...
cried buckets. hey, its really sad ok. hafiz said so too.
and we didn't even finish watching it.
1, it was too sad, 2, hafiz was late for home. hehe.
oh. recap.
met hafiz at chua chu kang control station at about 1.45 noons.
walked there with my "singapore girl" umbrella. wind was so strong, nearly blew me away. really.
felt like mary poppins. a FORCED mary poppins.
we went to NTUC to buy vege, prawns & macaroni.
walking home, hafiz suggested what was already on my mind.
"let's play in the rain."
this, despite the fact we were ALREADY under my brolly AND he had another brolly in his bag.
it was hilarious. haha.
post exam- stress therapy.
got home, mum made us peel the prawns.
spent 5 minutes arguing on how it should be done.
haha. mum chided us saying we needed to eat SOON.
i said, "see hafiz la! wash prawns like washing his own child."
haha. silly boy. he would have washed it individually [all 300 gms of it] if i hadn't stop him.
after that, we were scrubbing our hands like mad cuz it STINKED TERRIBLY.
macaroni rocks.
me and hafiz plan to do some cream & cheese macaroni after school some day.
oops. sorry doris. more cheese... hee. can't help it! i love cheese...
lovely saturday. now. i've gotta start cleaning. something. somewhere...
fast one!
hafiz is coming over to watch some TV...
& help me clean my room. [this he doesn't know!]
hehehe... have a great weekend everyone!
p.s. if i don't blog by tomorrow or i'm not in school on monday, i'm probably stuck in my room under a pile of dust/ clothes i was trying to clear or a bed/ wadrobe i was trying to move. wish me luck, my friend...
hafiz is coming over to watch some TV...
& help me clean my room. [this he doesn't know!]
hehehe... have a great weekend everyone!
p.s. if i don't blog by tomorrow or i'm not in school on monday, i'm probably stuck in my room under a pile of dust/ clothes i was trying to clear or a bed/ wadrobe i was trying to move. wish me luck, my friend...
Friday, July 11, 2003
delayed telecast
as promised... previously sexually- explicit entries have been removed. God forbid i ever blog at 1 a.m. again.
yesterday. [now is saturday already.]
school was ok. what's new? though our poor "troubled" principal couldn't help sharing with us his deep- seated problems...
what a pity... he seems to be going through so much TROUBLE... "i feel very troubled..." oh yes, mr kwek, so do we...
"i am very angry!"
"i am very disappointed!"
sigh. what great flurry of emotions spurred by vandalisms in the lecture theatre.
"i'm not fit to be your principal..." my, my. i couldn't have said it better myself.
once the emotional outburst had ended, we trudged back to class 20 minutes late.
only to find out at the end of the lesson we are getting HOMEWORK.
also known as re- writing our GP essay that we wrote for the mid- years.
so its like a RE- EXAM. and i don't like it!
well. lectures passed by insignificantly.
entered history LATE after lunching at the canteen.
we rushed all the way to the theatre, only to realize, that old foggy was still babbling and had yet to start lecturing.
next time, bruders & sheena, let's NOT rush.
lunch period proved to be... INTERESTINGLY interesting.
some friends division thing.
wouldn't care to elaborate, but i'll say i have new friends now...
literature lecture was hilarious, as usual.
mentioned all our "cute" thus WRONG analysis of the unseen Gothic passage.
from what i hear, my literature mates sure have a heck of an imagination.
for a detailed analysis of these "cute" analysis, visit www.blurty.com/users/vynara
she has an entire entry devoted to these side- aching analysing.
i was worried though, when one of the "cute" analysis sounded worryingly like mine.
uh- oh. there goes my B for literature.
post- school... headed to AL- AMEEN for cheesey prata.
*sings* YOU ROCK MYYYYY WORRRLDD....
fahrur had a $4 fried rice wrapped in an omelette, which he thought was too pricey.
cuz he couldn't stop saying, "eh, four dollars, you know," whenever he sampled mine, bryan's or hafiz's dish.
hahaha. he really cleaned HIS plate and many others'.
he wanted to bring back the plate and table and glass too. to make it worth his $4.
fahrur... fahrur. *shakes head*
wanna rate what we ate yesterday.
cheesey prata: 9.5/ 10 [if i give a 10 you'll call me bias.]
thai- style fried mee hoon: 9/ 10
beef kway teow: 9/ 10
fried rice wrapped in omelette & costs $4: 8.5/ 10
as you can see, food there ROCKS.
i see more trips to Al- Ameen after school already... *licks lips in anticipation*
one more thing to look forward.
me, hafiz, bryan & fahrur planning to head down to sentosa one of these days.
chill at the beach and all.
everyone in 02A05 who are interested is welcome...
time to kick back on some beauty land before we head back to mainland for more mugging...
so... who's up for it?
as promised... previously sexually- explicit entries have been removed. God forbid i ever blog at 1 a.m. again.
yesterday. [now is saturday already.]
school was ok. what's new? though our poor "troubled" principal couldn't help sharing with us his deep- seated problems...
what a pity... he seems to be going through so much TROUBLE... "i feel very troubled..." oh yes, mr kwek, so do we...
"i am very angry!"
"i am very disappointed!"
sigh. what great flurry of emotions spurred by vandalisms in the lecture theatre.
"i'm not fit to be your principal..." my, my. i couldn't have said it better myself.
once the emotional outburst had ended, we trudged back to class 20 minutes late.
only to find out at the end of the lesson we are getting HOMEWORK.
also known as re- writing our GP essay that we wrote for the mid- years.
so its like a RE- EXAM. and i don't like it!
well. lectures passed by insignificantly.
entered history LATE after lunching at the canteen.
we rushed all the way to the theatre, only to realize, that old foggy was still babbling and had yet to start lecturing.
next time, bruders & sheena, let's NOT rush.
lunch period proved to be... INTERESTINGLY interesting.
some friends division thing.
wouldn't care to elaborate, but i'll say i have new friends now...
literature lecture was hilarious, as usual.
mentioned all our "cute" thus WRONG analysis of the unseen Gothic passage.
from what i hear, my literature mates sure have a heck of an imagination.
for a detailed analysis of these "cute" analysis, visit www.blurty.com/users/vynara
she has an entire entry devoted to these side- aching analysing.
i was worried though, when one of the "cute" analysis sounded worryingly like mine.
uh- oh. there goes my B for literature.
post- school... headed to AL- AMEEN for cheesey prata.
*sings* YOU ROCK MYYYYY WORRRLDD....
fahrur had a $4 fried rice wrapped in an omelette, which he thought was too pricey.
cuz he couldn't stop saying, "eh, four dollars, you know," whenever he sampled mine, bryan's or hafiz's dish.
hahaha. he really cleaned HIS plate and many others'.
he wanted to bring back the plate and table and glass too. to make it worth his $4.
fahrur... fahrur. *shakes head*
wanna rate what we ate yesterday.
cheesey prata: 9.5/ 10 [if i give a 10 you'll call me bias.]
thai- style fried mee hoon: 9/ 10
beef kway teow: 9/ 10
fried rice wrapped in omelette & costs $4: 8.5/ 10
as you can see, food there ROCKS.
i see more trips to Al- Ameen after school already... *licks lips in anticipation*
one more thing to look forward.
me, hafiz, bryan & fahrur planning to head down to sentosa one of these days.
chill at the beach and all.
everyone in 02A05 who are interested is welcome...
time to kick back on some beauty land before we head back to mainland for more mugging...
so... who's up for it?
Thursday, July 10, 2003
today
generally: great day
highlights:
1. mind- boggling morning talk. bout' virginity and its preciousness. something caught my ear: secondary virginity. uh huh.
2. more mind- bogglers in Lit with D Yeo. planned our lives for next ten years or so. proud to say it wasn't the first time i was doing it. i'm ever the life-planner.
3. got back my PC results. 13/ 25. not happy with it. not happy at all.
4. rough ride with my guy. sorted out the chinks. all cool now. heh.
5. passed history... whee! after 4 Fs & 1 O later, voila! i got my D! wa- hey... and to think i wanted to leave jc earlier this year cuz i knew i'll NEVER pass history. ahakz. very self- satisfied.
6. just barely made it for GP. but i'm pleased. a pass is better than nothing.
post- school: he bought me chocolates. yay! a gift for my passes or something. thank you...
watched cartoons.
got a back- rub.
had the longest nap ever. 4 hours. hahaha. i'm a pig.
basically: life is life. nothing has changed. with all my angst and sorrows and troubles, it's all still the same. and i guess, at some point of time, you have to just accept the routine of life and make the best out of it. which is what i'm trying to do now...
p.s. will be heading to bkt timah to grab some cheese prata. join me, anyone? cheesey prata really rocks.
generally: great day
highlights:
1. mind- boggling morning talk. bout' virginity and its preciousness. something caught my ear: secondary virginity. uh huh.
2. more mind- bogglers in Lit with D Yeo. planned our lives for next ten years or so. proud to say it wasn't the first time i was doing it. i'm ever the life-planner.
3. got back my PC results. 13/ 25. not happy with it. not happy at all.
4. rough ride with my guy. sorted out the chinks. all cool now. heh.
5. passed history... whee! after 4 Fs & 1 O later, voila! i got my D! wa- hey... and to think i wanted to leave jc earlier this year cuz i knew i'll NEVER pass history. ahakz. very self- satisfied.
6. just barely made it for GP. but i'm pleased. a pass is better than nothing.
post- school: he bought me chocolates. yay! a gift for my passes or something. thank you...
watched cartoons.
got a back- rub.
had the longest nap ever. 4 hours. hahaha. i'm a pig.
basically: life is life. nothing has changed. with all my angst and sorrows and troubles, it's all still the same. and i guess, at some point of time, you have to just accept the routine of life and make the best out of it. which is what i'm trying to do now...
p.s. will be heading to bkt timah to grab some cheese prata. join me, anyone? cheesey prata really rocks.
=============================
Carpenters, The - Superstar
=============================
Long ago, and, oh so far away
I fell in love with you
Before the second show.
Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear,
But you’re not really here.
It’s just the radio.
Don’t you remember you told me
You loved me baby?
You said you’d be coming back this way
Again baby.
Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby.
I love you, I really do.
Loneliness is such a sad affair,
And I can hardly wait
To be with you again.
What to say, to make you come again?
Come back to me again,
And play your sad guitar.
Carpenters, The - Superstar
=============================
Long ago, and, oh so far away
I fell in love with you
Before the second show.
Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear,
But you’re not really here.
It’s just the radio.
Don’t you remember you told me
You loved me baby?
You said you’d be coming back this way
Again baby.
Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby.
I love you, I really do.
Loneliness is such a sad affair,
And I can hardly wait
To be with you again.
What to say, to make you come again?
Come back to me again,
And play your sad guitar.
thoughts
i know where i stand, i know where i belong, i know who are my friends, and i know who are not. so don't bother to pretend.
had photo- taking today. hilarious. and fun. fun shots for 02A05 this year will definitely reflect on the segregations in the class.
for once, i don't really care. i'm happy where i am and i'm sure all the different cliques are too. so screw you.
been searching auctions for snow globes. sigh. i guess these stuff don't come in cheap. guess i'll have to save up or wait till i am earning great big buckeroos before i'll own the damn beautiful thing.
i can relate to snow globes. being stuck in a glass dome which every now and then is picked up and rattled but then you get glitter and snow floating all over you. it reflects on the trade- off nature of life. price to pay to be dazzled and showered with beauty.
i had a long courtship so i want a long courtyard. don't ask me what that means. it just crossed my mind. i think its funny. in a weird, mysterious way.
i realize i've cried for my father more these days than i did on the day he actually... left. went. whatever. maybe reality is just sinking in. talk about time lag.
i'd like to think i'm young, warm and wonderful... but i just feel weary, beaten and damn fucking cynical. don't ask me why.
i flunked my econs P1. sign of things to come. i'm flunking my life away. aah... why bother.
speaking of which, byst asked me if i'm still a virgin during econs lecture... i presume he is shocked. hahaha.
been feeling lots of conflicting emotions lately... juxtaposed mental state. happy- sad, death- celebrate life, tears- laughter, violence- endearments... its only making me feel more & more confused. argh. screw it.
to top it off... quizzy stolen from my beloved aught's xanga... {why never come for photo- taking??? grr...}
30 questions
THREE THINGS I DO IN THE MORNING
01 | shut my alarm up
02 | grab a towel
03 | bathe
THREE ACCESSORIES ON ME
01 | watch
02 | ear- rings
03 | the occasional, erm, fish- reel necklace?
THREE THINGS ON MY BED
01 | pillows
02 | soldier
03 | notes
THREE OF MY FAVOURITE PEOPLES
01 | my mum
02 | hafiz
03 | farhana & zarina
THREE OF MY BEST CLASS PALS
01 | hafiz
02 | si blyan
03 | fahrur
THREE THINGS I DRINK
01 | coke
02 | ribena
03 | mocha
THREE THINGS I EAT
01 | chocolates
02 | sambal prawn
03 | mushrooms
THREE THINGS ON MY MIND
01 | failure
02 | money
03 | well... yeah. my dad.
THREE OF MY FAV MOVIES
01 | runaway bride
02 | finding nemo
03 | my best friend's wedding
THREE OF MY FAV SONGS
01 | anything by the beatles
02 | barry white's the first, the last, my everything
03 | nirvana's polly
i know where i stand, i know where i belong, i know who are my friends, and i know who are not. so don't bother to pretend.
had photo- taking today. hilarious. and fun. fun shots for 02A05 this year will definitely reflect on the segregations in the class.
for once, i don't really care. i'm happy where i am and i'm sure all the different cliques are too. so screw you.
been searching auctions for snow globes. sigh. i guess these stuff don't come in cheap. guess i'll have to save up or wait till i am earning great big buckeroos before i'll own the damn beautiful thing.
i can relate to snow globes. being stuck in a glass dome which every now and then is picked up and rattled but then you get glitter and snow floating all over you. it reflects on the trade- off nature of life. price to pay to be dazzled and showered with beauty.
i had a long courtship so i want a long courtyard. don't ask me what that means. it just crossed my mind. i think its funny. in a weird, mysterious way.
i realize i've cried for my father more these days than i did on the day he actually... left. went. whatever. maybe reality is just sinking in. talk about time lag.
i'd like to think i'm young, warm and wonderful... but i just feel weary, beaten and damn fucking cynical. don't ask me why.
i flunked my econs P1. sign of things to come. i'm flunking my life away. aah... why bother.
speaking of which, byst asked me if i'm still a virgin during econs lecture... i presume he is shocked. hahaha.
been feeling lots of conflicting emotions lately... juxtaposed mental state. happy- sad, death- celebrate life, tears- laughter, violence- endearments... its only making me feel more & more confused. argh. screw it.
to top it off... quizzy stolen from my beloved aught's xanga... {why never come for photo- taking??? grr...}
30 questions
THREE THINGS I DO IN THE MORNING
01 | shut my alarm up
02 | grab a towel
03 | bathe
THREE ACCESSORIES ON ME
01 | watch
02 | ear- rings
03 | the occasional, erm, fish- reel necklace?
THREE THINGS ON MY BED
01 | pillows
02 | soldier
03 | notes
THREE OF MY FAVOURITE PEOPLES
01 | my mum
02 | hafiz
03 | farhana & zarina
THREE OF MY BEST CLASS PALS
01 | hafiz
02 | si blyan
03 | fahrur
THREE THINGS I DRINK
01 | coke
02 | ribena
03 | mocha
THREE THINGS I EAT
01 | chocolates
02 | sambal prawn
03 | mushrooms
THREE THINGS ON MY MIND
01 | failure
02 | money
03 | well... yeah. my dad.
THREE OF MY FAV MOVIES
01 | runaway bride
02 | finding nemo
03 | my best friend's wedding
THREE OF MY FAV SONGS
01 | anything by the beatles
02 | barry white's the first, the last, my everything
03 | nirvana's polly
Wednesday, July 09, 2003
a lil' bit of music to lift us up...
Young and Warm and Wonderful
By: Tony Bennett
Young and warm and wonderful
You are all I dreamed you'd be
Dreams that seemed improbable
All at once have come true, now I see
Every searching heart finds its happiness
Love is only a matter of time
Young and warm and wonderful at last
You're here, my love, and love is mine
*to everyone looking for love, falling in love, already in love, not in love... we are young. we have all the time in the world. or so i'd like to believe. love is only a matter of time. and if you don't want it, it won't come.*
Young and Warm and Wonderful
By: Tony Bennett
Young and warm and wonderful
You are all I dreamed you'd be
Dreams that seemed improbable
All at once have come true, now I see
Every searching heart finds its happiness
Love is only a matter of time
Young and warm and wonderful at last
You're here, my love, and love is mine
*to everyone looking for love, falling in love, already in love, not in love... we are young. we have all the time in the world. or so i'd like to believe. love is only a matter of time. and if you don't want it, it won't come.*
Tuesday, July 08, 2003
flunctuating emotions
yippee! exams are finally over... no more mugging, no more studying, no more burning the midnight oil... well at least not till sometime next week. haha. it was lovely to be able to just waste the day away knowing we didn't have to rush home to study or anything of that sort. me n my sweetie took a bus to town... it feels like foreign land now. it was nice to be normal lazy teenagers again. lunched at far east 5th floor. cheese roti john, yum. [shout- out to si dolis! cheese roti john rocks too!]
walked around far east... then we entered this toy shop. i don't know why. this child in me took over and i was just gazing at all the wonderful toys. those classic toys. figurines. archie comics. huge huge huggable teddy bears. saw a larger than life nemo. lots of beanie babies. mickey mouse. it was my entire childhood compressed and fitted into a cozy little toy shop in the first level of far east plaza. and how aptly the encounter came, on the very day that i broke away from my hectic jc life. it was a trip down memory lane. all the toys, the figurines.
then we came to those globe like thingies. i dunno what u call it. but its a glass globe with a bear or sth in it, n when u shake it, glitter/ snow or whatever that's in it, showers all over the bear etc. get it? i think its a globe something something. i saw one with cinderella and her prince, little mermaid, sleeping beauty, in small palm sized globes. they cost about $39. i thought of collecting them. they are so beautiful. then the next shelf there were more of em'. but they were bigger. much, much bigger. almost the size of a fishbowl. maybe 3/4 of a fishbowl. and one had all the fairy tale characters, snow white, sleeping beauty, belle and cinderella. it was beautiful. then i saw the loveliest globe. it had belle in it, in her famous yellow ball gown and she was reading a book, surrounded by all the talking teacup, chandelier and whatnots. it was breath-taking. i'm not kidding. if beauty and the beast was as much a part of your childhood as it was mine, you'll know what i mean.
i kept looking at it. then i saw the price. $239/++. i was so sad. disappointed. i knew i might never own it. and the thought just broke my heart. it occured to me as the kind of gift your dad will shower you with on your birthday. cuz he's the only one who can afford, and the only one who will spend that much on you. and it really really saddened me. i started tearing in the middle of the toy shop. i couldn't help it. hafiz looked at me and asked what's wrong. i said, "i wonder if my dad would have bought it for me," and the tears just poured. he didn't even know what to say, the poor boy. so i just sat there squatting in front of the glass shelf containing the glass globes which will never be mine. and cried. aptly, the shop was playing sarah mclhalan's "angel". it definitely didn't help stop the tears.
i eventually left the shop and stopped crying. but the thought never left my mind.
we went to tangs and topshop to look for hafiz's prom stuff. i must say, that boy is lucky to look so good in everything he wears. darn it.
we ended our town 'tour' with a brownie temptation blizzard from DQ at orange julius. delectable.
took the bus home, and i napped for a while. went to lot one, took my pics. nice ones.
he sent me home.
all along, i couldn't forget the way i felt in the toy shop. lost. abandoned. left behind. discriminated.
what have i done to not deserve a father?
i think i'll stop here. sorry.
yippee! exams are finally over... no more mugging, no more studying, no more burning the midnight oil... well at least not till sometime next week. haha. it was lovely to be able to just waste the day away knowing we didn't have to rush home to study or anything of that sort. me n my sweetie took a bus to town... it feels like foreign land now. it was nice to be normal lazy teenagers again. lunched at far east 5th floor. cheese roti john, yum. [shout- out to si dolis! cheese roti john rocks too!]
walked around far east... then we entered this toy shop. i don't know why. this child in me took over and i was just gazing at all the wonderful toys. those classic toys. figurines. archie comics. huge huge huggable teddy bears. saw a larger than life nemo. lots of beanie babies. mickey mouse. it was my entire childhood compressed and fitted into a cozy little toy shop in the first level of far east plaza. and how aptly the encounter came, on the very day that i broke away from my hectic jc life. it was a trip down memory lane. all the toys, the figurines.
then we came to those globe like thingies. i dunno what u call it. but its a glass globe with a bear or sth in it, n when u shake it, glitter/ snow or whatever that's in it, showers all over the bear etc. get it? i think its a globe something something. i saw one with cinderella and her prince, little mermaid, sleeping beauty, in small palm sized globes. they cost about $39. i thought of collecting them. they are so beautiful. then the next shelf there were more of em'. but they were bigger. much, much bigger. almost the size of a fishbowl. maybe 3/4 of a fishbowl. and one had all the fairy tale characters, snow white, sleeping beauty, belle and cinderella. it was beautiful. then i saw the loveliest globe. it had belle in it, in her famous yellow ball gown and she was reading a book, surrounded by all the talking teacup, chandelier and whatnots. it was breath-taking. i'm not kidding. if beauty and the beast was as much a part of your childhood as it was mine, you'll know what i mean.
i kept looking at it. then i saw the price. $239/++. i was so sad. disappointed. i knew i might never own it. and the thought just broke my heart. it occured to me as the kind of gift your dad will shower you with on your birthday. cuz he's the only one who can afford, and the only one who will spend that much on you. and it really really saddened me. i started tearing in the middle of the toy shop. i couldn't help it. hafiz looked at me and asked what's wrong. i said, "i wonder if my dad would have bought it for me," and the tears just poured. he didn't even know what to say, the poor boy. so i just sat there squatting in front of the glass shelf containing the glass globes which will never be mine. and cried. aptly, the shop was playing sarah mclhalan's "angel". it definitely didn't help stop the tears.
i eventually left the shop and stopped crying. but the thought never left my mind.
we went to tangs and topshop to look for hafiz's prom stuff. i must say, that boy is lucky to look so good in everything he wears. darn it.
we ended our town 'tour' with a brownie temptation blizzard from DQ at orange julius. delectable.
took the bus home, and i napped for a while. went to lot one, took my pics. nice ones.
he sent me home.
all along, i couldn't forget the way i felt in the toy shop. lost. abandoned. left behind. discriminated.
what have i done to not deserve a father?
i think i'll stop here. sorry.
Monday, July 07, 2003
a rocking punk love song. an ode to my sweets.
Happy Together
By: The Turtles
Imagine me and you, I do
I think about you day and night, it's only right
To think about the girl you love and hold her tight
So happy together
If I should call you up, invest a dime
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine
So happy together
I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies'll be blue
For all my life
Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together
I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies'll be blue
For all my life
Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together
Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba
Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba
Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together
So happy together
How is the weather
So happy together
We're happy together
So happy together
Happy together
So happy together
So happy together (ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba)
and a little extra......
loving you
and missing you
waiting to meet you
time crawls
oh so s l o w l y . . . . . . .
Happy Together
By: The Turtles
Imagine me and you, I do
I think about you day and night, it's only right
To think about the girl you love and hold her tight
So happy together
If I should call you up, invest a dime
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine
So happy together
I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies'll be blue
For all my life
Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together
I can't see me lovin' nobody but you
For all my life
When you're with me, baby the skies'll be blue
For all my life
Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together
Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba
Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba
Me and you and you and me
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be
The only one for me is you, and you for me
So happy together
So happy together
How is the weather
So happy together
We're happy together
So happy together
Happy together
So happy together
So happy together (ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba)
and a little extra......
loving you
and missing you
waiting to meet you
time crawls
oh so s l o w l y . . . . . . .
Sunday, July 06, 2003
this, my dear friends, was taken from Vynara's Blurty.
anyway, i must say the results is pretty hilarious.
i'm still laughing. and rolling. and shaking my head.
what a killer. good god, i'm tearing. thanx Vyn, this sure has made my day.... *laughs uncontrollably*
anyway, i must say the results is pretty hilarious.
i'm still laughing. and rolling. and shaking my head.
| ||||||||||||||||||||
what a killer. good god, i'm tearing. thanx Vyn, this sure has made my day.... *laughs uncontrollably*
oopsy daisy!
had a great weekend...
saturday:
PC paper in the morn. ok- ish. its over so forget it.
next, lunch at siam kitchen with mum n sweets. YUM.
then, home for a short nappie.
evenin', chalet bbq at pasir ris. did not stayover cuz...
was staying over at my aunt's place... where...
my cousin's girl was also stayin over.
it was fun. my femme cousin was promoting this facial products and evryone received a facial.
but me. ah, but of course. i can't stand people's hands all over my face. kinda sick.
we watched a hilarious malay comedy at about midnight or so.
in bed at unrecall-able hour.
chatted with my cousin's gf till 5 ams.
haha. all sort of girly shtuff. damn nice. felt so... GIRL.
we get along so well. we've only known each other for a year.
hehe.
then.
sunday:
woke up at 11 in a daze. ditto for my galpal.
brunched. my aunt makes ROCKING nasi lemak.
slacked the afternoon away... internet, PS, bingo... the works.
four- ish, relatives came streaming in to celebrate my younger cousins birthday.
cousinS, cuz they are twins.
13 this year. last year's gathering was when i first talked to my cousin's girl.
the rest, as they say, is history.
ate... talked... laughed... sang...
then me n my galpal watched gilmore girls.
we realized we both like dean. & hate jess.
we like the same people.
she left at night, and soon, i did too.
well.
that was my beautiiful life for two days.
lurveeeely.
had a great weekend...
saturday:
PC paper in the morn. ok- ish. its over so forget it.
next, lunch at siam kitchen with mum n sweets. YUM.
then, home for a short nappie.
evenin', chalet bbq at pasir ris. did not stayover cuz...
was staying over at my aunt's place... where...
my cousin's girl was also stayin over.
it was fun. my femme cousin was promoting this facial products and evryone received a facial.
but me. ah, but of course. i can't stand people's hands all over my face. kinda sick.
we watched a hilarious malay comedy at about midnight or so.
in bed at unrecall-able hour.
chatted with my cousin's gf till 5 ams.
haha. all sort of girly shtuff. damn nice. felt so... GIRL.
we get along so well. we've only known each other for a year.
hehe.
then.
sunday:
woke up at 11 in a daze. ditto for my galpal.
brunched. my aunt makes ROCKING nasi lemak.
slacked the afternoon away... internet, PS, bingo... the works.
four- ish, relatives came streaming in to celebrate my younger cousins birthday.
cousinS, cuz they are twins.
13 this year. last year's gathering was when i first talked to my cousin's girl.
the rest, as they say, is history.
ate... talked... laughed... sang...
then me n my galpal watched gilmore girls.
we realized we both like dean. & hate jess.
we like the same people.
she left at night, and soon, i did too.
well.
that was my beautiiful life for two days.
lurveeeely.
Saturday, July 05, 2003
too late now.
all's not awake.
nothing more can be done...
but i wish it wasn't so.
all's not awake.
nothing more can be done...
but i wish it wasn't so.
Friday, July 04, 2003
feeling music-y...
feel like singing... some songs... brings back memories...
============================
Wheatus - A Little Respect
============================
I tried to discover a little something to make me sweeter; Oh baby refrain from breaking my heart; I'm so in love with you; I'll be forever blue; That you give me no reason, you know you're making me work so hard; That you give me no . . . Soul; I hear you calling; Oh baby please give a little respect to me.
And if I should falter, would you open your arms out to me? We can make love not war, and live in peace with our hearts; I'm so in love with you; I'll be forever blue; What religion or reason could drive a man to forsake his lover? Don't you tell me no. . . Soul. I hear you calling; Oh baby please, give a little respect to me.
I'm so in love with you; I'll be forever blue; That you give me no reason, you know you're making me work so hard; That you give me no. Soul. I hear you calling. Oh baby, please give a little respect to me. Oh baby, please give a little respect to me.
Be Like That
3 Doors Down
She spends her days up in the north park,
Watching the people as they pass
And all she wants is just
A little piece of this dream,
Is that too much to ask
With a safe home, and a warm bed,
On a quiet little street
All she wants is just that something to
Hold onto, that's all she needs
If I could be like that,
I would give anything
Just to live one day, in those shoes
If I could be like that, what would I do,
What would I do
I'm falling into this, dreams
We run away
c'mon. sing- along. heh.
feel like singing... some songs... brings back memories...
============================
Wheatus - A Little Respect
============================
I tried to discover a little something to make me sweeter; Oh baby refrain from breaking my heart; I'm so in love with you; I'll be forever blue; That you give me no reason, you know you're making me work so hard; That you give me no . . . Soul; I hear you calling; Oh baby please give a little respect to me.
And if I should falter, would you open your arms out to me? We can make love not war, and live in peace with our hearts; I'm so in love with you; I'll be forever blue; What religion or reason could drive a man to forsake his lover? Don't you tell me no. . . Soul. I hear you calling; Oh baby please, give a little respect to me.
I'm so in love with you; I'll be forever blue; That you give me no reason, you know you're making me work so hard; That you give me no. Soul. I hear you calling. Oh baby, please give a little respect to me. Oh baby, please give a little respect to me.
Be Like That
3 Doors Down
She spends her days up in the north park,
Watching the people as they pass
And all she wants is just
A little piece of this dream,
Is that too much to ask
With a safe home, and a warm bed,
On a quiet little street
All she wants is just that something to
Hold onto, that's all she needs
If I could be like that,
I would give anything
Just to live one day, in those shoes
If I could be like that, what would I do,
What would I do
I'm falling into this, dreams
We run away
c'mon. sing- along. heh.
a stolen survey.... *eveil laughter*
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME
01 | death
02 | big people
03 | dogs
THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 | Hafiz
02 | my mum
03 | my male cousins
THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 | Dad & Mum
02 | Hafiz
03 | my soft toys
THREE THINGS I HATE:
01 | Taugeh
02 | Migraines
03 | Being yelled at
THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
01 | Love
02 | Economics
03 | Stalkers
THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
01 | Pencil Cases
02 | Papersss
03 | Picture of me my mum n dad
THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 | drinking tea with milk
02 | glancing at my nationalism notes every three seconds
03 | typing
THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | go do my pilgrimage
02 | travel
03 | decorate at least three houses
THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 | Laugh unstoppably
02 | smile with lotsa teeth
03 | watch cartoon for hours
THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
01 | crazy
02 | funny
03 | different
THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | Use a sewing machine
02 | clean my room constantly
03 | stop my laughing fits
THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
01 | the beatles
02 | waves
03 | baby's laughter
THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
01 | celine dion's heart going on & on
02 | pop
03 | long john silver's clanging bell and the "THANK YOU!" that comes after
THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
01 | it's like....
02 | oh shit
03 | i want, no need, chocolate
THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
01 | chocolate
02 | spicy anything
03 | hafiz's mushroom omelette
THREE THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN:
01 | higher concentration level
02 | how to have fun being a girl among girls
03 | how not to hyperventilate
THREE BEVERAGES YOU DRINK REGULARLY:
01 | coke
02 | strong coffee with milk
03 | good plain ol' H2O
THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:
01 | sesame street
02 | teenage mutant ninja turtles
03 | tom & jerry
RANDOM QUESTIONS.
01 | Spell your name backwards: azifron
02 | How did you get your live jounal name? inspired by roald dahl's BFG
03 | Are you homosexual? totally straight. but nothing against the deviant. *chuckles*
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME
01 | death
02 | big people
03 | dogs
THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 | Hafiz
02 | my mum
03 | my male cousins
THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 | Dad & Mum
02 | Hafiz
03 | my soft toys
THREE THINGS I HATE:
01 | Taugeh
02 | Migraines
03 | Being yelled at
THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
01 | Love
02 | Economics
03 | Stalkers
THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
01 | Pencil Cases
02 | Papersss
03 | Picture of me my mum n dad
THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 | drinking tea with milk
02 | glancing at my nationalism notes every three seconds
03 | typing
THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | go do my pilgrimage
02 | travel
03 | decorate at least three houses
THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 | Laugh unstoppably
02 | smile with lotsa teeth
03 | watch cartoon for hours
THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
01 | crazy
02 | funny
03 | different
THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | Use a sewing machine
02 | clean my room constantly
03 | stop my laughing fits
THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
01 | the beatles
02 | waves
03 | baby's laughter
THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
01 | celine dion's heart going on & on
02 | pop
03 | long john silver's clanging bell and the "THANK YOU!" that comes after
THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
01 | it's like....
02 | oh shit
03 | i want, no need, chocolate
THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
01 | chocolate
02 | spicy anything
03 | hafiz's mushroom omelette
THREE THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN:
01 | higher concentration level
02 | how to have fun being a girl among girls
03 | how not to hyperventilate
THREE BEVERAGES YOU DRINK REGULARLY:
01 | coke
02 | strong coffee with milk
03 | good plain ol' H2O
THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:
01 | sesame street
02 | teenage mutant ninja turtles
03 | tom & jerry
RANDOM QUESTIONS.
01 | Spell your name backwards: azifron
02 | How did you get your live jounal name? inspired by roald dahl's BFG
03 | Are you homosexual? totally straight. but nothing against the deviant. *chuckles*
Thursday, July 03, 2003
quizilla mania V. 0.2
i believe i can flyyyyyyy....
You have the Power of Flight!
What's Your Magic Power?
brought to you by Quizilla
i do feel lost this days. heh.
The Lost Soul
What sign of the Black Zodiac are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
i believe i can flyyyyyyy....
You have the Power of Flight!
What's Your Magic Power?
brought to you by Quizilla
i do feel lost this days. heh.
The Lost Soul
What sign of the Black Zodiac are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
mugged for goth.
finally.
8 p.m. right up to just now... which would be like, 1.41 a.m.
dammit.
i'm tired...
finally.
8 p.m. right up to just now... which would be like, 1.41 a.m.
dammit.
i'm tired...
Wednesday, July 02, 2003
hyperventilating...
in 3.
2.
1.
i'm so dead. i have yet to mug for goth n the friggin paper is tomorrow.
why am i so unbothered by my studies?
why don't i care?
why am i so unstudious?
why am i so lazy?
once again, questions with no answer.
my sweetie has a blog now. pretty corny. haha.
go check it ------> http://superhafiz.blogspot.com
i wonder what i'll do if i see my father again.
i wonder how come i don't seem to be able to recall him in detail.
what he was like, what he did, what he liked, what he ate...
i remember certain stuff. like our shared wrestling fanatism.
soccer. haha. he couldn't pronouce roberto baggio right. hehe.
he liked rice. dinner was rive or nothing. no noodles, no western. rice.
restaurant dining- must have rice. anything goes, but there must be RICE!
he single- handedly kept rice industries in business.
he loved spicy stuff. yum... he cooks a rocking 'asam pedas'. erm, some spicy, chilli gravy with fish.
he was soooooo proud to be bugis. so am i.
he loved telling stories. many, many wonderful, magical, old, mythical stories.
once i was wrapping his present on the day itself and he wanted to peek to know the gift so he opened my door.
i saw it coming and i shrieked and pounced on him when he just opened my door ever so slightly.
he was really actually shocked cuz i was so loud and sudden. haha.
he was really shocked. i saw his face. hehe.
sigh.
i wish he was still around... i don't think i really got to know my father all that well.
i guess i thought i had a whole lifetime ahead of me to get to know him.
its so weird. in about 6 years time, i would have lived longer without him than i have with.
scary. it actually feels as though i've lived without him longer than i had lived with him.
i guess since he was around for only 12 years, technically i can only recall properly about... say, 5 years?
oh god. that's so sad. although i do recall things that happened 7/ 8 years ago, since he's been gone... the memories kinda went too.
when i recall my past it gets harder and harder to remember his part in them.
but i can recall my mum's presence easily. maybe because she's still around.
but really.
wow.
i just realized how little i remember.
i wish he had stayed longer.
in 3.
2.
1.
i'm so dead. i have yet to mug for goth n the friggin paper is tomorrow.
why am i so unbothered by my studies?
why don't i care?
why am i so unstudious?
why am i so lazy?
once again, questions with no answer.
my sweetie has a blog now. pretty corny. haha.
go check it ------> http://superhafiz.blogspot.com
i wonder what i'll do if i see my father again.
i wonder how come i don't seem to be able to recall him in detail.
what he was like, what he did, what he liked, what he ate...
i remember certain stuff. like our shared wrestling fanatism.
soccer. haha. he couldn't pronouce roberto baggio right. hehe.
he liked rice. dinner was rive or nothing. no noodles, no western. rice.
restaurant dining- must have rice. anything goes, but there must be RICE!
he single- handedly kept rice industries in business.
he loved spicy stuff. yum... he cooks a rocking 'asam pedas'. erm, some spicy, chilli gravy with fish.
he was soooooo proud to be bugis. so am i.
he loved telling stories. many, many wonderful, magical, old, mythical stories.
once i was wrapping his present on the day itself and he wanted to peek to know the gift so he opened my door.
i saw it coming and i shrieked and pounced on him when he just opened my door ever so slightly.
he was really actually shocked cuz i was so loud and sudden. haha.
he was really shocked. i saw his face. hehe.
sigh.
i wish he was still around... i don't think i really got to know my father all that well.
i guess i thought i had a whole lifetime ahead of me to get to know him.
its so weird. in about 6 years time, i would have lived longer without him than i have with.
scary. it actually feels as though i've lived without him longer than i had lived with him.
i guess since he was around for only 12 years, technically i can only recall properly about... say, 5 years?
oh god. that's so sad. although i do recall things that happened 7/ 8 years ago, since he's been gone... the memories kinda went too.
when i recall my past it gets harder and harder to remember his part in them.
but i can recall my mum's presence easily. maybe because she's still around.
but really.
wow.
i just realized how little i remember.
i wish he had stayed longer.
QUIZILLA MANIA
TRUE LOVE
Indeed it is... You are the envy of others...
Cherish it and make it last a lifetime...
Are you truely in love with your Guy / Girl?
brought to you by Quizilla
Awwwww, you are a ROMANTIC! Whether you're
floating on cloud 9, or singing in the rain,
you're ready for love and ready to live life to
the fullest. Everything is beautiful and
nothing can be all bad in your wonderful
opinion. Go on and grab your dancing shoes and
have a night on the town with the love of your
life, you romantic person you!
Which categorical personality are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You have a AWESOME boyfriend. He's caring, he
seems to fit you, and sounds like a guy any
girl will want. All I can say is hold onto him
and enjoy your time with him, very rarely will
you ever be this lucky. Maybe never. Your a
very lucky woman.
How good is your boyfriend?
brought to you by Quizilla
try it. its very stress- relieving.
TRUE LOVE
Indeed it is... You are the envy of others...
Cherish it and make it last a lifetime...
Are you truely in love with your Guy / Girl?
brought to you by Quizilla
Awwwww, you are a ROMANTIC! Whether you're
floating on cloud 9, or singing in the rain,
you're ready for love and ready to live life to
the fullest. Everything is beautiful and
nothing can be all bad in your wonderful
opinion. Go on and grab your dancing shoes and
have a night on the town with the love of your
life, you romantic person you!
Which categorical personality are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You have a AWESOME boyfriend. He's caring, he
seems to fit you, and sounds like a guy any
girl will want. All I can say is hold onto him
and enjoy your time with him, very rarely will
you ever be this lucky. Maybe never. Your a
very lucky woman.
How good is your boyfriend?
brought to you by Quizilla
try it. its very stress- relieving.
I PASSED MY SATS!!!!!!
WHEE!!!!!
BUT ITS JUST SLIGHTLY ABOVE MINIMUM.......
SHOULD I RETAKE??
WHEE!!!!!
BUT ITS JUST SLIGHTLY ABOVE MINIMUM.......
SHOULD I RETAKE??
Tuesday, July 01, 2003
in desperate need of medical attention
FIRST AND FOREMOST, kudos to kristy lim for loaning me tissue during our two exam papers today.
what would i be without you. and your tissues.
sigh. how was i to know today's papers would be in the lecture theatre instead of the hall?
stupid school.
there i was freezing and trying to stop a runny nose.
flailing your hand under your nose and looking upwards only proved in vain.
once again, stupid school.
i am sneezing until i'm tearing and i cough until my chest feels like its being scraped with sandpaper.
ouch.
i hate this school.
within this two examination days i have felt more mental pressure than i have ever felt in my entire lifetime.
so much stress!
doesn't help that my civics tutor is an imbecile who:
1) can't tell time
2) can't count
3) can't speak without raising his voice beyond deafening decibels
4) don't seem able to do ANYTHING administrative and hence, chucks them all to me. why don't you give me half your pay then, arsehole.
sorry. vehement anger expression. i could list more of his incapablities but what can i say?
we're stuck with him till school year ends.
i realize that i only started taking school seriously this year. after 14 years or so of education.
how else do i explain the pressure? the newness of this phobia of failure?
i realized something today. "the only thing that motivates me to study (and get stressed in the process) is my fear of failure."
the minute those words came out of my mouth i knew i had spoken the truth about myself.
i hate that feeling when i've failed.
gnawing regret, sad, sad, sad... low self- esteem... disappointment... depression.
i am, after all, full of melancholy.
exam stress has also taken its toll on our relationship.
i guess this is why relationships within the same school (and class!) is not encouraged.
i get stressed. i breath hard. he sees it. he gets stressed. he gets worried. he looks all funny. i ask him why. he tells me why. i tell him not to worry. he tells me he can't help it. i become more edgy. he become more sensitive.
and ladidadida.
cyclical motion of life.
but we try to make up for it. and when i know that if i spend a second longer with him i would burst, i avoid spending that second.
no point getting upset. when we're both uptight, anything and everything can be a cause for argument.
hence today.
but at least we talked on the phone at night.
so all's well in the Garden of Eden.
well. bout the exams.
it was okay. ironically, i was more prepared for history and econs than i was for literature.
although that doesn't mean i'll pass, but its a change from my past preparation for exams.
i did three context questions for lit, which is like, totally wrong or something.
who cares. screw it.
at least i know i did OK for the three essays. unless i get discriminated for writing all three context questions.
but i don't really give a damn. why bother, eh?
as for econs, well. it might by far be my best attempt at econs yet. i repeat, that does not mean a pass.
ditto for european history.
oh well.
that's life so far.
and due to all that mental exhaustion, i've regressed and read all my fairytale big books this evening.
to 'repent' for all the facts that i've stuffed into my brain.
as dickens says, "Fact and Fancy should go together."
FIRST AND FOREMOST, kudos to kristy lim for loaning me tissue during our two exam papers today.
what would i be without you. and your tissues.
sigh. how was i to know today's papers would be in the lecture theatre instead of the hall?
stupid school.
there i was freezing and trying to stop a runny nose.
flailing your hand under your nose and looking upwards only proved in vain.
once again, stupid school.
i am sneezing until i'm tearing and i cough until my chest feels like its being scraped with sandpaper.
ouch.
i hate this school.
within this two examination days i have felt more mental pressure than i have ever felt in my entire lifetime.
so much stress!
doesn't help that my civics tutor is an imbecile who:
1) can't tell time
2) can't count
3) can't speak without raising his voice beyond deafening decibels
4) don't seem able to do ANYTHING administrative and hence, chucks them all to me. why don't you give me half your pay then, arsehole.
sorry. vehement anger expression. i could list more of his incapablities but what can i say?
we're stuck with him till school year ends.
i realize that i only started taking school seriously this year. after 14 years or so of education.
how else do i explain the pressure? the newness of this phobia of failure?
i realized something today. "the only thing that motivates me to study (and get stressed in the process) is my fear of failure."
the minute those words came out of my mouth i knew i had spoken the truth about myself.
i hate that feeling when i've failed.
gnawing regret, sad, sad, sad... low self- esteem... disappointment... depression.
i am, after all, full of melancholy.
exam stress has also taken its toll on our relationship.
i guess this is why relationships within the same school (and class!) is not encouraged.
i get stressed. i breath hard. he sees it. he gets stressed. he gets worried. he looks all funny. i ask him why. he tells me why. i tell him not to worry. he tells me he can't help it. i become more edgy. he become more sensitive.
and ladidadida.
cyclical motion of life.
but we try to make up for it. and when i know that if i spend a second longer with him i would burst, i avoid spending that second.
no point getting upset. when we're both uptight, anything and everything can be a cause for argument.
hence today.
but at least we talked on the phone at night.
so all's well in the Garden of Eden.
well. bout the exams.
it was okay. ironically, i was more prepared for history and econs than i was for literature.
although that doesn't mean i'll pass, but its a change from my past preparation for exams.
i did three context questions for lit, which is like, totally wrong or something.
who cares. screw it.
at least i know i did OK for the three essays. unless i get discriminated for writing all three context questions.
but i don't really give a damn. why bother, eh?
as for econs, well. it might by far be my best attempt at econs yet. i repeat, that does not mean a pass.
ditto for european history.
oh well.
that's life so far.
and due to all that mental exhaustion, i've regressed and read all my fairytale big books this evening.
to 'repent' for all the facts that i've stuffed into my brain.
as dickens says, "Fact and Fancy should go together."